National Eating Disorders Awareness: The Hurt We Don’t Talk About

“Eating disorders are so incredibly complex. And they are not about the food.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk about something that sits quietly in the corners of so many lives. And it’s also something we don’t talk about nearly enough because it’s wrapped in shame, silence, and misunderstanding. And the topic is eating disorders.

This isn’t just a national awareness week to me. It’s a reminder of how many people walk through the world carrying a pain that no one sees. A reminder that the strongest people you know might be fighting battles with food, with their bodies, with their own reflection. A reminder that healing is possible. But it’s not easy. And it’s never linear.

Eating Disorders are not about vanity. They’re about survival. People love to reduce eating disorders to “wanting to be skinny,” but that’s not the truth. Not even close. Eating disorders often grow out of trauma, anxiety, perfectionism, or the desperate need to feel in control when everything else feels chaotic. They’re coping mechanisms that become cages. They’re ways of surviving will eventually start to suffocate.

And the cruelest part is that most people suffering look “fine” on the outside. They smile. They function. They pretend. They hide. Because the world has taught them that their pain is embarrassing, dramatic, or self‑inflicted.

We Live in a culture that worships self‑punishment. And we’re surrounded by messages that tell us to shrink, restrict, cleanse, detox, earn our food, burn our calories, and hate our bodies until they fit someone else’s idea of “acceptable.” We praise people for losing weight without ever asking if they’re okay. We compliment discipline without knowing it might be self‑destruction.

Awareness means calling out the culture that normalizes harm. It means refusing to participate in conversations that shame our own bodies or anyone else’s. It means unlearning the lies we were raised on.

Recovery isn’t a straight line. It’s not a single moment of clarity or a dramatic breakthrough. It’s a thousand tiny choices. It’s eating when you don’t want to. Resting when your mind screams at you to move. Speaking kindly to yourself when the old voice whispers cruelty.

It’s crying in the grocery store. It’s celebrating the days you nourish yourself without guilt. It’s forgiving yourself when you slip. It’s learning to trust your body again, even when it feels impossible. And recovery is not weakness. It is strength in its purest form.

The person who always says they “already ate.” The friend who jokes about needing to “earn” their dinner. The coworker who never joins for lunch. The family member who avoids mirrors. The person who seems confident but is quietly unraveling inside.

Awareness means choosing compassion over assumptions. It means listening without judgment. It means creating space where people feel safe enough to be honest. If you are struggling, you deserve nourishment, and rest. You deserve a life that isn’t ruled by fear, shame, or numbers. You deserve to feel at home in your body not at war with it.

You are not broken. You are not alone. And you are not defined by the hardest thing you’ve survived.

National Eating Disorders Awareness isn’t just a date. It’s a call to soften. To speak gently. To challenge the toxic norms, we’ve accepted for far too long. To check on the people we love. To check on ourselves. To build a world where bodies are respected, not judged. Where food is nourishment, not punishment. Where healing is celebrated, not hidden.

As someone who has battled with eating disorders for more years than I haven’t, I know what it means to live inside a cycle that feels impossible to break. My struggles were born out of trauma but just like so many of my other survival behaviors and even now, after all this time, the echoes of that pain still follow me.

My body isn’t as depleted or fragile as it once was. But the thoughts haven’t magically disappeared. They still show up every day, whispering the old rules, the old fears, and the old lies. I still avoid eating in front of people whenever I can. I still feel that familiar tightening in my chest when food becomes a spotlight instead of nourishment.

Eating disorders are a quiet trap, consuming, and cruel. They take root in the mind long before they show up in the body. They convince you that you’re in control while slowly taking that control away. They drain you mentally and physically, piece by piece, until you feel like there’s nothing left but the disorder itself. And the hardest part is how invisible it can all be. How easy it is to smile, to function and to pretend. How easy it is for the world to miss the pain entirely.

This isn’t weakness. It’s something that grows out of hurt, out of fear, out of the desperate need to feel safe in a world that hasn’t always been safe. And even though the thoughts still come. Even though the habits still tug at me. I’m here. I’m still fighting. I’m still choosing to stay. That matters more than anyone on the outside will ever understand. Thanks for reading! And reach out for help.

Affirmation: My body is not my enemy. I deserve compassion, nourishment, and peace.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Obama Runtz Strain Review

“When I was a kid, I inhaled frequently. That was the point.”

-Barack Obama

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to tell you about a strain called Obama Runtz by River Remedy/The Sipp. I don’t know about you, but after a year of the current administration, I needed to see some hope. And this strain makes me miss the days of former president Obama.

Obama Runtz is a 70/30 indica-dominant hybrid. It is a 3-way cross between Afghani x OG Kush x Runtz. Afghani is another landrace indica strain found in the mountains of Afghanistan. OG Kush is a very popular indica-dominant hybrid strain that is a cross between Chemdawg x Hindu Kush. Runtz is a very popular hybrid that is a cross between Zkittlez x Gelato. These three strains are some of the first ones that I tried when I first began using medical cannabis. So, a combination of all three has made for an enjoyable experience.

The top terpenes for this are B-Caryophyllene, a-Humulene, Caryophyllene Oxide. The medical benefits include relief from depression, chronic stress, anxiety, nausea, appetite loss, insomnia, and other sleep conditions. And when the political environment gets too heavy, this strain is perfect for taking you down a few notches and help you chill. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’

Affirmation: I am manifesting more cannabis into my life.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

National CBD Month

“It’s CBD. It helps with the healing process and inflammation, stuff like that…it’s make your life a better place.”

-Nate & Nick Diaz, MMA fighters

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy, go away. Today is National CBD Month, a time dedicated to raising awareness and educating the public about cannabidiol (CBD).

By now, millions of Americans have learned about the benefits of CBD. However, there are still individuals who choose pharmaceuticals over this natural aid. That is why it’s imperative to clearly state the advantages of using CBD, so others around the world can gain access to it.

CBD has helped many people with both physical and mental health needs, yet it continues to carry a stigma. The main reason for this is the long-standing legal ban on cannabis, since cannabis and CBD are derived from the same plant. When the 2018 Farm Bill federally legalized all hemp products, it clarified that hemp is a part of the cannabis plant containing less than 0.3% THC. With CBD, individuals can experience the benefits of the plant without getting high.

In 2019, the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) reported that CBD ranked fourth in the U.S. for wellness-related Google searches. This demonstrates CBD’s growing popularity and the public’s desire to learn more. Despite this, 35% of Americans were still unfamiliar with it at the time. In 2020, CBDMD founded National CBD Month to celebrate the availability of CBD products and to expand access to them. Their mission has helped highlight why CBD is sometimes prescribed to cancer patients when traditional medications fall short (https://nationaltoday.com/national-cbd-month/?utm_source=chatgpt.com).

Unfortunately, as if recent legislation hadn’t caused enough harm, a clause has been introduced that would ban these products starting in November 2026. While it’s true that some companies produced dangerously unregulated hemp products that were sold to minors and some consumers became sick, the response should have been regulation, not an outright ban. Instead of protecting consumers through oversight and safety standards, lawmakers chose to eliminate access altogether, which is one of many questionable decisions they’ve made.

My hope is that lawmakers will reconvene and recognize that banning this substance entirely will do more harm than good. Proper regulation would protect consumers while allowing people to make healthier choices for their medical and mental health needs.

Thanks for reading, and stay tuned for updates on this issue.

Affirmation: I choose informed, mindful wellness that supports my body and nervous system.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Apple Banana Bread Strain Review

“If weed puns are a sin, then I’ll see you inhale.”

-Unknown

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk to you about the strain known as Apple Banana Bread. And this time of the year a freshly baked bread sounds pretty good.

Apple Banana Bread is an indica-dominant strain. The genetics include Platinum Cookies x Grandaddy Purple x Blue Power x Gelatti. And this might be one of my new favorite strains. Let’s look at the diverse genetic line a little closer. Platinum Cookies is a cross between OG Kush x Durban Poison. Grandaddy Purple is a cross between Mendo Purps x Skunk x Afghanistan. Blue Power is a 4-way cross between Sour Double x Master Kush x The White x Blue Moonshine. Gelatti is a cross between Gelato x OG Biscotti. What a truly beautiful genetic line. No wonder I love this strain.

On inhale the first taste is something very sweet and somewhat floral. The dominant terpenes in this strain are Pinene, Caryophyllene and Myrcene. The medical benefits include relief from stress, anxiety, pain, mood, appetite, and sleep. This strain has some truly hard-core munchies that hit with gusto. It’s not so strong that it will give you “couch lock.” It feels a lot like blue dream with more indica. 

I highly suggest this strain as an everyday use. It can be used on a lunch break if used in moderation. And for nighttime use, it works good enough to send you gently into dreamland. The only thing that would be better would be a concentrate in this strain. And I am headed out to look for it. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’

Affirmation: I make health choices when it comes to weed.

***Don’t forget to watch the video***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Blueberry Muffins Strain Review

“I’m just a little “high” maintenance.”

-Unknown

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to tell you about a strain that reminds me of cold mornings when I was a kid. The strain is called Blueberry Muffins.

Blueberry Muffins is an 80/20 indica-dominant hybrid that many stoners love. It is a cross between Purple Panty Dropper x Blueberry. Purple Panty Dropper is a cross between Purple Haze x Oregon Grape x Matanuskan Mist. Blueberry is a cross between Purple Thai x Afghan. This strain is just loaded with great genetics. And it’s one that I really enjoy.

The major terpenes in this strain are Myrcene, Caryophyllene, Limonene, Humulene, and Bisabolol. Patients report relief from conditions such as chronic pain, anxiety, stress, nausea, headaches, and migraines. This strain is just an all-around good strain. It’s good for both day and nighttime. It’s still a very indica strain that is what I need with overstimulation. If you are used to smoking heavy indicas, this one is not that potent. Beware of the dreaded “couch lock” if not used in moderation though. But it is still strong enough to use at night. This is a very popular strain in the area in which I live. And I would highly recommend this strain for potency and that wonderful berry flavoring. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin’.

Affirmation: I am a natural stoner

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Jelly Breath Strain Review

“A marijuana high can enhance core human mental abilities.”

-Sebastian Marincolo

 Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negativity energy, go away. Today, I want to talk to you about a strain called Jelly Breath. And thinking about warm toast with butter and jelly goes perfectly with this one.

The strain Jelly Breath is an indica-dominant hybrid. The genetics are a cross between Mendo Breath x Do-si-do. Now let’s break this down and talk about this strains heritage. Mendo Breath is an indica strain made by crossing OGKB x Mendo Montage. Sounds like dankness to me. And Do-si-do is a cross between  OGKB (OG Kush Breath is a Girl Scout Cookies phenotype) x Face Off OG. I don’t know about you, but if a strain has GSC in the lineage, it’s bound to be good.

There is a lot of indica in this strain. Medical benefits provide relief from insomnia, depression,  and muscle spasms. And I will agree 100%! The taste is earthy, fruity, and sweet. The major terpenes in this strain are trans-Caryophyllene, Limonene and Linalool. This is considered a top in hybrids for me. Because it gives you just enough “get-up-and-go” to satisfy any smoker without the worry about an anxiety provoking sativa overload. Thanks for reading! And keep blazin.’

Affirmation: Being a stoner has taught me that I can problem solve, build new things and give old things new life.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Red Runtz Strain Review

“It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned. “

-Bill Lee

 Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negativity energy, go away. Today, I want to discuss a strain known as Red Runtz. This sassy little strain gives you that get up and go” th50at is sure to make your day productive.

Red Runtz is a 50/50 hybrid cross between Runtz X Red Pop. Runtz is a very popular hybrid strain that is a cross between Zkittlez x Gelato. Red Pop is a  60/40 indica-dominant hybrid strain from Strawberry x Cookies & Cream. This strain has a very sweet and fruity taste.

Top terpenes are Caryophyllene, Limonene and Humulene. And patients report relief from anxiety, stress, depression, nausea, and insomnia. This is another good strain for that mid-day needing a “pick-me-up” at lunch time. Not bad for a strain where you can experience a nice “chill” moment to get ready for the rest of the day. Keep blazin.’ Stay safe.

Affirmation: I am grateful for the plant that helps me relax and find joy in life’s simple blessings.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Candied Apples Strain Review

“Weed taught me patience. Mostly because I forget what I was doing.”

-Unknown

 Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negativity energy, go away. Today, I want to tell you about the strain known as Candied Apples. This one fits the time of year perfectly.

Candied Apples is a sativa-dominant hybrid that is a cross between Blueberry x Pineapple x Afghan. Blueberry is an indica-dominant hybrid cross between Purple Thai x Thai. Pineapple also known as “Pineapple OG” hybrid of possible genetics between OG Kush x Golden Goat x Pineapple Kush. Afghan is a naturally occurring stain in the Hindu Kush area of Afghanistan with minimal human influence. Thank you to the indica-dominant strains for taming the sativa influence.

Top terpenes include Pinene, Myrcene and Limonene. And it has been known to provide relief from depression, stress, and anxiety. Even though this strain shows a slight dominance of sativa in the terpenes, I didn’t have to worry about the additional anxiety. Another great lunchtime strain. Keep blazin.’ And stay safe.

Affirmation: I am using cannabis mindfully to achieve my goals, whether it’s focus, relaxation, or creativity.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Budtender Moment: Banana Cream Cake Strain Review

“Some of my finest hours have been spent on my back veranda, hemp and observing as far as my eye can see.”

-Thomas Jefferson

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negativity energy, go away. Today, I want to review the strain Banana Cream Pie. Yep, doesn’t it sound like a strain that would go well during the Thanksgiving holiday? Sit tight, while I describe this nice add to the holidays.

Banana Cream Cake a.k.a Banana Cake is a sativa-dominant hybrid. This strain is made by crossing Wedding Cake x Monkey Banana. This has become one to add to my list of likes. With it being a sativa-dominant strain, I was a little skeptical about whether I would like it. But this little girl is a nice strain.

This strain hit me directly in the eyes like a prized fighter. But it’s not too anxiety provoking. I would be cautious with novice users. Because it will sneak up on you with it’s powerful kick. Patients choose this strain to help with symptoms of chronic depression, anxiety, and pain. I know. There is enough indica in it to tame that anxiety associated with sativas.

This strain was on Leafly’s top 12 strains of 2022 harvest. And what a sweet beauty she is. The sweetness of vanilla combined with chestnuts give this strain a sweet and hardy flavoring. Dominant terpenes are Limonene, trans-Caryophyllene and Linalool. Those with anxiety issues can enjoy but need to be careful and not overdo it.

Thanks for reading! Keep smilin’ and blazin.’

Affirmation: I am grateful for how cannabis expands my creative ability.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#Thispuzzledlife

Dear Abuser: 

I am the revolution you never expected.

Who am I?

I’ll tell you who I am.

I am the light you tried to strangle, the light you tried to stifle in your chokehold.

But my light bled all over the pages of your book, your preconceived narratives, your filthy words and your attempts to bring terror back into the blank space of my eyes.

Who am I?

I’ll tell you who I am.

I birthed revolution in my bones like the many women that came before me.

I ignited flames beneath my skin, using the fiery spirits of women who walked beside me

as matches; we breathed fire into each other’s hearts until the world could see us and from the ashes we were reborn.

Who am I?

I’ll tell you who I am.

I am the fear in your hatred, the pain that you tried to use to violate my sacred spaces, rip me apart until I was nothing,

but I knew I would always be something, somebody, and now I am.

I am layers and layers of the love and power that act as your kryptonite,

and with the words and actions of all those who rose with me, I’ll build an impenetrable wall.

Who am I?

I am the thing that nightmarish people have nightmares about,

wake up sweating about, thinking about —

their furrowed brows tense with self-doubt —

wondering if I and the other warriors I march with could ever come back to life.

Who am I?

I am the restless rebel you tried to bury,

the one you tried to pull out by the root and eradicate when she began to grow from the seed.

Who am I?

I’ll tell you who I am.

I am the girl you left for dead thinking she’d always fall and never rise again.

I am the girl you cut with your razor blade wrath, the girl you thought would never fight back.

I am the girl you underestimated, the woman you tormented, the child whose shackles you tightened.

Who am I?

I think you already know –

I think you understand.

I am the prisoner you tried to cage, the little girl you made afraid –

I am the woman who never gave up, the one who exposed your charade —

Who am I?

I am everything and anything that you will stand againstto try to regain control.

For every source of darkness, there is a bleeding soul,

one that shines so brightly that the entire war zone becomes illuminated.

I am the truth, your karma, the revolt —

I am the resistance, the pieces you tried to keep shattered, coming back together again.

I emerge quietly, but I resound loudly —reverberate through your skin.

My power was never yours, and it was never yours to take.

Who am I?

I am the second coming,

of everything and everyone 

you tried to break.

Shahida Arabi

#Thispuzzledlife