This Puzzled Life is a mental health and recovery blog exploring addiction, trauma healing, LGBTQ experiences, humor, and the strange moments that shape us.
“If you can’t remember my name, just call me ‘indica,’ I’ll still put you down.”
-Unknown
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to tell you about another strain that when you talk about cannabis this strain will likely be discussed. And it’s the classic and very wonderful OG Kush strain.
OG Kush is an 80/20 indica-dominant hybrid strain. It’s a cross between Chemdawg x Lemon Thai x Hindu Kush. Chemdawg is believed to be from Thai and Nepalese landrace strains. However, the exact lineage is unknown. And it’s also said to originate from bag seed found at a Grateful Dead concert in the 90s. Lemon Thai is a cross between a classic Thai landrace strain. And it’s crossed by Dutch Flowers x Hawaiian sativa. Hindu Kush is a landrace strain from the Hindu mountain range. This strains origins start in Florida. The “OG” is sometimes called “Original Gangster, “ “Ocean Grown” or “Original Grower.” And it’s known to be a foundational strain. Matt “Bubba” Berger cultivated the strain from an accidental cross involving Lemon Thai x Chemdawg. Berger then brought the genetics to Los Angeles in 1996. Josh Del Rosso refined its cultivation and distribution thereby solidifying its legendary status.
Top terpenes in this strain are Myrcene, Limonene, Caryophyllene, Linalool, and Pinene. Patients report relief from stress, anxiety, chronic pain, insomnia, depression, and appetite loss. This strain is perfect for breakthrough pain. This strain is perfect for breakthrough pain. “Couchlock” is readily available even without being asked. So not one to use during the day unless you have time for the effects to wear off before doing an activity. Oh, and keep the Cheetos available for mass consumption. Please keep in mind that each grow will be different and the flower’s effects will differ depending on which region of the country that the plant is grown. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’
Affirmation: The plant guides me toward clarity, not escape.
“Healing shouldn’t require a credit check. Sometimes the best medicine is the one you can actually afford. And the peace of mind that comes with it.”
-This Puzzled Life
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Let’s go ahead and address the elephant in the dispensary. Medical cannabis is healing, holy, and helpful. But the prices? The prices are giving “Are you sure you don’t want to just suffer instead?” energy. I walked in once, saw the total, and my debit card tried to crawl out of my wallet like, “Absolutely not, ma’am. I was not built for this.”
But here’s the truth. Nobody should choose between relief and rent. Nobody should be out here raw‑dogging life because the dispensary menu looks like a luxury steakhouse. So today, we’re talking about how to medicate on a budget without selling plasma, pawning your air fryer, or pretending you suddenly love CBD-only gummies. Grab your spreadsheet, your sense of humor, and whatever dignity you have left after your last edible incident. Because we’re going in.
For those of us who need this medication, sometimes the prices can be overwhelming. But no one should miss out on the opportunity to heal with natural medications because of money. And getting into the cannabis lifestyle can be overwhelming on this life adventure. I have been a cannabis patient for many years. And here are some of the things that have proven to be advantageous while feeling my way through the industry.
1. If People Judge You, Let Them Judge From Over There
If you have conservative friends or family who condemn you for using this medication, go ahead and create some distance. Their comments are rooted in outdated propaganda and vibes from the “Reefer Madness” era. You don’t need that energy. You need relief.
2. Find a Budtender and Let Them Teach You
When you’re new, find a budtender who knows their stuff. Most of them genuinely understand the products and can help you figure out what works for your symptoms. Think of them as your cannabis tour guide minus the khaki shorts and megaphone.
3. Try Indica, Sativa, and Hybrid. Then Pay Attention
Everyone’s body responds differently. Try all three categories and notice which one helps you the most. This isn’t a personality quiz. This is survival.
4. Make a Spreadsheet Like the Organized Stoner You’re Becoming
Yes, a spreadsheet. Yes, it will save your sanity. Include things like strain name, type (indica, sativa, hybrid), product type (flower, edible, vape, concentrate), lineage, terpenes, effects, brand, dispensary, and your personal notes. After a while, you’ll start seeing patterns. If you like two strains with the same terpenes, chances are you’ll like others with those same terpenes. This is how you stop guessing and start shopping smart.
5. Write Down What You Actually Think
Don’t be shy. Write your honest opinions. Did it help? Did it flop? Did it make you clean your entire house at 2 a.m. or contemplate the meaning of life? Write it down.
6. Start With Prerolls and Rotate Them Like a Pro
Prerolls are budget‑friendly and great for beginners. I keep a rotation because your body adjusts to new strains every 3–4 days. Rotating helps with symptoms and keeps your tolerance from climbing Mount Everest. This saves money and keeps your medication effective.
This type of medical treatment isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay. But for many of us, this plant is saving our lives every single day. As you learn more and grow more comfortable, you can explore fancier tools and devices. All at your own pace and within your financial lane. Healing should feel accessible, empowering, and sustainable. And with the right strategies, it absolutely can be.
At the end of the day, medical cannabis shouldn’t feel like a financial hostage situation. It should feel accessible, empowering, and like the relief you’ve been searching for. And not a punishment for having symptoms on a Tuesday. So, take your time. Learn about your products. Stretch your dollars. And ignore anyone still reacting like the church ladies just spotted a bare ankle about “the Devil’s Lettuce.” This plant is saving lives, easing pain, calming storms, and giving people their quality of life back every single day. And if anyone has a problem with that? Tell them to take it up with your symptom relief, because that’s the only thing running this show. Budget smart. Medicate wisely. Live loudly. Stay tuned for the second part of this blog with more useful information. Thanks for reading! And feel free to ask me any questions.
Affirmation: I honor my body, my budget, and my boundaries. I deserve relief. I deserve clarity. And I can navigate this cannabis journey with confidence, wisdom, and a whole lot of humor.”
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to tell you about a strain that is popular with so many users. It is the omnipotent Runtz strain.
Runtz is a balanced hybrid that is a cross between Zkittlez x Gelato. Zkittlez is a cross between Grape Ape x Grapefruit x Secret Unknown strain. Gelato is a cross between Sunset Sherbet x Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies. Runtz is known for its candy flavoring. And the sweetness flows through me with each inhale. This is a strain that wasn’t created until 2017 in the Bay Area of California by the “Runtz Crew.” These people include Ray Bama, Nick, and rapper Yung LB. The strain was named Leafly’s “Strain of the Year” in 2020.
Top terpenes in this strain are B-Caryophyllene, Limonene, and Linalool. Patients report relief from pain, inflammation, anxiety, depression, mood swings, insomnia, appetite loss, nausea, low motivation, and fatigue. Please keep in mind that each grow will be different and the flower’s effects will differ depending on which region of the country that the plant is grown. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’
Affirmation: My body softens, my mind opens, and my spirit settles.
“If life hands you chaos, season it like cast‑iron and keep on cookin’.”
-Tinkerbell, Chairwoman of Household Dignity and Selective Judgment
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away.Lord knows if we don’t cleanse this house before we start talking, one of these cats is gonna summon something we can’t put back. Piper already knocked over a jar of buttons like she was opening a portal. Coco’s in the kitchen licking cornbread crumbs off the floor like she’s trying to divine the future. And Tinkerbell? She’s perched on the back of the recliner judging everybody like the church usher who knows your business.
So yes, light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Shoo the foolishness out the door. We’re about to discuss cannabis. And these Deep South cats have opinions they did not ask permission to have.
Piper struts in like she owns the deed to the house. Tail high. Eyes wide. And already judging.
“Why,” she begins, “do half these strains sound like folks we’re related to.” She’s not wrong.
Piper’s Official List of ‘That’s Somebody’s Cousin’ Strains
Bubba Kush– “Tell me that ain’t the man who fixed your alternator in 2009.”
Larry OG – “Larry still owes Mama twenty dollars.”
Billy Kimber – “He’s the one who got banned from the Piggly Wiggly.”
Runtz – “That’s the kid who used to steal Capri Suns at Vacation Bible School.”
Piper says cannabis naming committees are clearly run by “men named Scooter who wear camo to funerals.” She ends her segment by knocking over a Mason jar and calling it “cultural commentary.”
Coco waddles in like she just finished a plate of cornbread and is ready to testify before Congress.
“Listen,” she says, licking crumbs off her chest, “if you name a strain after food, I will assume it’s a snack. That’s on y’all.”
Coco’s Deep South Review of Food Strains
Georgia Pie– “Where is the cobbler? Don’t play with me.”
Banana Pudding– “If it ain’t layered with Nilla wafers, it’s false advertising.”
Gumbo– “This one made me mad on principle.”
Watermelon Zkittlez-“This tastes like somebody lied.”
Coco proposes new, more honest Southern strain names such as:
“I’m Too High to Go to Walmart”
“Front Porch Philosophy Hour”
“Who Ate the Last Biscuit”
“I Swear I Heard a Ghost in the Hallway”
She ends her speech by stealing a Cheez-It and blaming it on “the humidity.”
Tinkerbell sits like a church lady who’s about to tell you she’s praying for you. But also judging your life.
“These names,” she says, “are for people who think they’re having a spiritual awakening but are actually just staring at the ceiling fan.”
Examples from the Church Bulletin of Weed
Northern Lights-“Ma’am, you are in Mississippi. The only lights you’re seeing are from the Dollar General sign.”
Skywalker OG – “You are not walking anywhere. Sit down.”
God’s Gift -“Bold. Very bold.”
Third Eye– “That’s not enlightenment. That’s dehydration.”
Tinkerbell recommends all spiritual strains come with a warning label that reads, “May cause you to think you’ve discovered the meaning of life when you’ve actually just been petting the same blanket for 45 minutes.” She concludes by reminding everyone that she is the only one in this house with dignity. Piper says, “Rename everything. Y’all lack imagination.” Coco says, “Snacks should be included with purchase.” Tinkerbell says, “Please stop embarrassing the household in front of the neighbors.”
And that, is all the wisdom these Mississippi cats have to offer today. And how my cats, three unlicensed, unqualified, deeply Southern creatures, have chosen to explain cannabis strain names. With judgment, crumbs, and the confidence of a possum in a Waffle House parking lot. And even that is hanging by a thread.
Piper’s already stomping off like she’s late for her shift at the Waffle House. Coco has entered her post‑snack coma. And cannot be reached for comment. Tinkerbell is staring out the window like she’s narrating a true‑crime documentary about the rest of us.
As we wrap this up, go on and light the charcoal one more time. Sweep the foolishness out the door. And thank the Lord above that cannabis doesn’t come with a family reunion attached. Because half of these strain names already sound like they’d show up uninvited. Asked for gas money. And leave with your Tupperware.
Until next time, may your weed be smooth. Your snacks be plentiful. And your cats mind their business for at least five consecutive minutes. Amen, Ashe, and y’all behave now. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’
Affirmation: I can handle whatever today throws at me. Even if it’s lopsided, underseasoned, or delivered by a cat with an attitude. I stay grounded, I stay Southern, and I stay unbothered.
“I’m high on life. Oh, wait, sorry, that’s just marijuana.”
-Unknown
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. And since tomorrow is Child Abuse Awareness and the ribbon is blue, I want to talk to you about one of my favorite strains for PTSD called Blue Dream.
This strain I was introduced in the early days of figuring out the state’s cannabis program. While Blue Dream is a slightly sativa-dominant hybrid. If you’ve been a survivor with PTSD, you understand how very uncomfortable the visual and audio overstimulation can be. It slowly engulfs you until something is able to break the forward motion of those symptoms. This strain is one that does just that for me.
Let’s look at this strain’s lineage. Blue Dream is a 60/40 sativa-dominant cross between Blueberry x Haze. Blueberry is a cross between Purple Thai x Afghan. Haze are landrace strains, which are naturally grown in the wild with no genetic manipulation from Mexican, Colombian, Thai, and South Indian decent. Typically, the hazy strains can taste like a sweaty sock. One of the best things about this strain is that blueberry flavoring is strong enough to offset the hazy flavors. And it lasts from packed bowl to last toke. But despite the sativa side, that hazy indica comes through to help quell anxiety provoking effects.
The top terpenes in this strain are Myrcene, Pinene, and Caryophyllene. The medical benefits include chronic stress, chronic pain, depression, and sleep disorders. This strain is perfect for a one-gram attitude adjustment. Make this strain a staple in your cannabis medicine cabinet. Thanks for reading! And keep blazin.’
Affirmation: I treat myself like I’m my kindest, best bud.
“If God didn’t want us learning about cannabis, he wouldn’t have made half my cousins impossible to tolerate without it.”
-Mavis “Two-Puffs” Delacroix
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy, go on and get. Today, we are gathered here in this living room that smells like lavender spray, and cat hair. This will officially kick off Cannabis Awareness Month under the watchful, judgmental, and wildly unqualified leadership of my three feline board members.
Piper has already climbed onto the podium wearing a green tutu like she’s the spiritual advisor of the entire Gulf South. Coco is in the corner eating something that is absolutely not food. And Tinkerbell is perched high above us all. And blinking slowly as if to say, “I cannot believe I share a mortgage with these people.” And she has no mortgage. So, take a breath. Set your intentions. Hide your snacks. The cats are ready to educate the public. And Lord help us. They have prepared statements.
Welcome back to the only blog on the internet where Cannabis Awareness Month is celebrated with the same energy most families reserve for Easter Sunday and tax refunds. In this house, the educational programming is run by three cats who have never once read a law. Paid a bill. Or respected personal space. Piper is already wearing a green tutu like she’s the patron saint of responsible consumption. Coco is pre-gaming with the emergency snacks. And Tinkerbell is in the corner judging everyone’s life choices with the quiet authority of a Southern grandmother. If you came here calmly, you’re in the wrong place. If you came here for chaos, education, and a sprinkle of cat-led activism, pull up a seat.
Every April, the rest of America politely acknowledges Cannabis Awareness Month like it’s a PTA meeting. Meanwhile, down here in the Deep South, my household treats it like the Met Gala of Mindfulness. Except the outfits are Dollar General pajamas. The snacks are missing (because Coco). And the educational portion is led by three cats who have never paid a bill in their lives. But bless it, they try.
Piper “The Tootin’ Tutu Tornado” kicks off the month by dragging a green feather boa across the living room like she’s the Beyoncé of harm reduction. She hops on the table. Knocks over a brochure and says, “Cannabis Awareness Month means education, mother.”
She’s not wrong. Cannabis Awareness Month is all about understanding safe, responsible use. Reducing stigma. Learning the difference between THC, CBD, and “whatever your cousin grew behind the shed in 1998.” Knowing your limits. And for the love of Mississippi, not mixing edibles with a church potluck.
Piper then tries to teach the household about terpenes but gets distracted by her own tail. Awareness is a journey. Coco, the Snack Lobbyist, takes a different approach. She sets up a “Cannabis & Munchies Preparedness Station.” Which is really just an empty bag of Doritos. A half-chewed cat treat. And a sticky note that says, “PLAN AHEAD.” She insists it’s educational. Coco’s key message is ,“If you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready.” She’s basically a Southern auntie in a fur coat.
Tinkerbell, the dignified conductor of this circus, takes Cannabis Awareness Month very seriously. She sits everyone down for a lecture titled “Cannabis, Calm, and Why Y’all Are Doing Too Much?” Which covers setting intentions. Respecting your body. Understanding dosage. Avoiding the “I’m fine” spiral that ends with you reorganizing the pantry at 2 AM. And the importance of not letting Piper run any more workshops. She ends her presentation by flicking her tail and walking away. Which is cat for “class dismissed.”
Piper stands on the arm of the couch like she’s delivering the State of the Union. Coco is eating something he absolutely should not be eating. Tinkerbell is judging us all. Together, they recite the official household pledge, “We promise to consume responsibly, stay hydrated, respect the plant, and never, ever let Piper be in charge of snacks.” Amen.
And that concludes this month’s household seminar on cannabis awareness is brought to you by Piper’s unlicensed enthusiasm. Coco’s snack-based curriculum. And Tinkerbell’s unwavering belief that everyone else is doing it wrong. As we wrap up, remember to stay informed. Stay responsible. And never let a cat who can’t even find his own tail be in charge of dosage discussions. May your month be calm. Your snacks be plentiful. And your cats be slightly less dramatic than mine. But honestly, I wouldn’t count on it. Longest “Big Beautiful affirmation” in the history of our country. Thank you for your attention to this matter. Thanks for reading! Stay informed.
Affirmation: “I move through this month with clarity, humor, and a heart unbothered by chaos. I honor the plant. Protect my peace,l. And trust myself to stay grounded even when Piper is preaching. Coco is crunching. And Tinkerbell is judging from above. I am calm. I am capable. And I am fully prepared for whatever foolishness this household delivers.”
“Before we begin, I’d like to remind everyone that I am the smartest creature in this house, and that includes the humans who keep losing their lighters.”
-Piper, Chief Chaos Strategist
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy, evacuate the premises immediately. The Feline Administration is now in session. And Lord help whoever thought they could show up unprepared.
Piper, wearing her “I run this agency” bowtie. She steps onto the podium like she’s about to rewrite state law with a crayon. Coco is rustling through the official documents which is bold, considering she can’t read and also ate page three. Tinkerbell sits at the head of the table. Paws crossed. And radiating the kind of judgment that could shut down a whole committee hearing.
Today’s agenda is simple:
Educate the public.
Maintain order (Tinkerbell’s job, allegedly).
Steal snacks (Coco’s only contribution).
Cause chaos with confidence (Piper’s entire personality).
So, inhale peace. Exhale foolishness. And brace yourself. The Feline Administration has convened. They have statements, opinions, and absolutely no qualifications.
Camera clicks. Reporters whisper. Someone drops a pen. Coco eats it.
Piper clears her throat dramatically.
Piper struts up to the podium wearing a crooked green bowtie with the confidence of a cat who has never once been wrong in her life. She taps the mic. “Is this thing on? Good. Ladies, gentlemen, and those who prefer to mind their business. Welcome to the first annual Cannabis Awareness Month Press Briefing. I will be taking no follow‑up questions unless they involve snacks or compliments. As the Chief Awareness Officer of this household, I would like to remind the public that cannabis education is important. For example, dosage matters. Hydration matters. And letting Coco near the edibles does not matter. Because she will eat the packaging instead.”
Behind her, Coco is already rummaging through the press corps’ bags like TSA with no supervision. Tinkerbell sits on a high stool. Paws crossed. And looking like she’s about to veto the entire event.
Coco nods proudly with a granola bar wrapper stuck to her face. And waddles up dragging a bag of snacks she absolutely stole.
Coco: “Thank you. My platform is simple. If you’re going to elevate your mind. You better elevate your snack game. That’s all. No questions.”
She leaves the podium to go investigate a reporter’s purse.
Tinkerbell glides up like a Supreme Court Justice who has had enough.
Tinkerbell: “Let me be clear. Cannabis Awareness Month is about responsibility, education, and not acting like whatever Piper is doing right now.”
Piper is, in fact, chewing on the mic cord.
Tinkerbell: “Know your limits. Know your laws. Know that if you start reorganizing the pantry at 2 AM, that’s on you, not the plant.”
She steps down with the dignity of a queen who has spoken truth.
Piper hops back up, tail high.She leaps back onto the podium, one paw raised like she’s blessing the congregation and threatening them at the same time.
Piper: “Let this be known. Cannabis Awareness Month has been officially observed. Audited. And improved by the Feline Administration. Stay educated. Stay responsible. And for the love of whiskers, stop acting surprised when Coco steals your snacks. That’s on you. If humans spent half as much time learning about cannabis as they do losing their keys, the world would be a calmer place.”
Piper smirks, leans into the mic, and delivers the final line, “Class dismissed. Y’all be safe out there.”
Piper drops the mic. Coco eats the mic and burps. Tinkerbell flicks her tail. Which signals the end of the session and leaves the room. Press conference adjourned.
Affirmation: “I stay grounded, educated, and unbothered. Even when the cats running this press conference clearly are not. I honor my peace, respect the plant, and trust myself to navigate chaos with humor, clarity, and snacks.”
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to tell you about a strain that is good for the time of year where we all begin enjoy the warm sun. This strain is called Suncake.
Suncake is a 60/40 indica-dominant hybrid. It is a cross between Sunset Sherbet x Wedding Cake. Sunset Sherbet is a cross between Girl Scout Cookies x Pink Panties. Wedding Cake is a cross between Triangle Kush x Animal Mints. It’s flavoring consists of a sweet, creamy, berry, vanilla cake, and tropical citrus. However, I just identified light citrus notes.
Top terpenes in this strain are Limonene, Caryophyllene, and Linalool. Patients report relief from conditions such as insomnia, chronic pain, appetite loss, nausea, chronic stress, depression, and mood swings. This strain I would call an easy and slightly indica dominant strain. Yes, you can use this during the day as long as you’re an experienced indica smoker. Novice smokers might enjoy this one better as night. Either way, it does not act real indica. The effects feel much more like a balanced hybrid with a nice elevation in mood.
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to tell you about a strain called Platinum Kush Breath.
Platinum Kush Breath is a 70/30 indica-dominant hybrid strain. It is a cross between OG Kush x Afghani. OG Kush is a cross between Chemdawg x Lemon Thai x Hindu Kush. Afghani is a pure indica landrace strain found in the Hindu Kush mountains of Afghanistan. I wasn’t able to determine a definitive flavor. But it’s reported flavors of berry, fruity, peppery, spicy, and sweet.
Dominant terpenes are Caryophyllene, Limonene and Linalool. Patients report relief from depression, headaches, migraines, chronic pain, inflammation, cramps, or muscle spasms. Even though this strain’s potency doesn’t hit hard to begin with, it acts very much like a creeper strain. The indica effects were slow but powerful once they settled in. I would say that this strain needs to be used in moderation. Because if your not careful “couch lock” might be upon you. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’
Affirmation: I am worthy of health and happiness, and I choose to relax my mind and body.
“I’m not a great pothead or anything like that…but weed is much, much less dangerous than alcohol.”
-Bill Maher
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk to you about the cannabis holiday 11/30.
The cannabis holiday was developed by adding the well-known cannabis holidays 4/20 and the cannabis concentrate holiday 7/10. Together they form a holiday that is about the combination of concentrates and flower. And since Thanksgiving is synonymous with gorging ourselves with food, edibles also seem like a good fit. There are other products known as “doughnuts” or “hash holes.”
The new holiday began November 30, 2023, in Los Angeles and was called National Hash hole Day. It consists of a fat joint of high-quality cannabis with a rosin-filled center. And when it burns there is a hold that is formed all the way down the center. As someone who enjoys these types of products, I can say with confidence that you need to make sure that you have nothing to do. It is a very strong high that has the ability to couch lock you for a couple of hours. It’s like smoking flower and hitting dabs all at the same time (https://www.visithollyweed.com/first-annual-national-hashhole-day-on-11-30-features-berner-marcos-surita/, 2023).
Thanks for reading! Have a safe and happy National Hash Hole Day!
Affirmation: I only share my kindest buds with my kindest buds, and vice versa.
***Don’t forget to watch the video! Because of the cannabis content I wasn’t able to embed the link. But the link is right down there.***
This Puzzled Life 