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darnold1975

I’ve Had It Podcast: The Southern Sass Survival Guide for Blue Dots in Red States

“Sometimes the only thing keeping me from losing my already lost religion is two Oklahoma women yelling about petty grievances.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Invoke the ancestors. Preferably the messy ones. The ones who show up wearing house shoes. Clutching a gas‑station fountain drink. And whispering, “You’re gonna wanna sit down for this one.”

Because today, we gather in the sacred, humid, mosquito‑infested, spiritually charged arena to praise. Roast. And spiritually hydrate the chaotic holiness that is the I’ve Had It Podcast. The only place where two white liberal women from the red MAGA plains of Oklahoma have somehow built a sanctuary for every exhausted blue‑dot soul trying to survive in a country where people still proudly drink out of Stanley cups like it’s a personality trait. Let me set the table like MeeMaw used to that is loud. And with sweet tea strong enough to dissolve enamel.

Jennifer Welch and Angie “Pumps” Sullivan aren’t just podcasters. They are the patron saints of Petty Grievances. The matriarchs of Messy Liberation. And the spiritual mothers of every liberal woman trapped in a red state. While trying not to throat‑punch someone at the grocery store.

Jennifer, the sarcastically blunt atheist queen, speaks with the kind of clarity that only comes from years of saying, “No, actually, that is stupid” out loud. She’s the type of woman who could walk into a revival tent. Sneeze. And accidentally deconstruct someone’s entire theology. On a side note I’ll also say that she is an Olympic level Pickle Ball Champion like we’ve never seen before in the history of the world.

Then there’s Pumps. Lord help us all. Pumps is a recovering evangelical, the HBIC (Head Beaver In Charge), the teeny weenieologist, the MeeMaw Meat Curtains because she is much older than Jennifer. And apparently the patron saint of Asexuality in the Bible Belt. Her last sexual encounter was somewhere around 1,000 days ago. And Jennifer multiplies that number tenfold with each episode until the math starts giving Old Testament genealogy. We’re approaching, “And on the 40,000th day, Pumps rested.”

And presiding over this circus of holy chaos is Kiley. The beautiful lesbian gaytriot producer who keeps the entire operation from combusting. She’s the glue, the duct tape, the Queer Logistics Coordinator who ensures Jennifer and Pumps don’t accidentally start a small fire while recording. She produces the hilarious fuckery with the precision of a woman who knows exactly how chaotic these two can be.

As a white liberal sarcastic woman myself from the red MAGA state of Mississippi, these ladies have become my emotional support podcast. They take the isolation of wanting equal rights for everyone. While surrounded by neighbors who think democracy is optional. And turn it into a family. A loud, hilarious politically petty family that supports all marginalized groups and stands up for democracy. Despite the red hatred swirling around them.

And let me tell you. And their nicknames for politicians? Baby, they speak fluent Southern shade. People like Donald “Cankles McTaco Tits” Trump, Moses Mike Grindr Johnson, the late Lindsey “Lady” Graham, “Big Titty” Bryon Knoem, “Smokey-eyed sociopath” JD Vance, “Lyin’” Ted Cruz, Flamboyant Jesse “Lady” Waters with Fox News, Natalie “The Bunny Boiler” Harp, Markwayne “Booster Box” Mullin, and others. I heard that recently they both spoke with Mitch “Dead Not Dead” McConnell for twenty minutes from his life support rehabilitation unit. They roast public figures with the same energy my Aunt Linda uses when she says, “I’m not saying she’s trashy. But she does own a leopard‑print Bible cover.”

They expose the closetocracy, the folks who legislate against the very community they enjoy on weekends, with surgical precision and the comedic timing only two women who have truly had it can deliver. Are they crass? Yes. Do they speak my language? Absolutely. Do they have a low tolerance for stupidity? Honey, they have a negative tolerance.

And Pumps, sweet Pumps, if she would stop vaping like she’s trying to summon a Civil War ghost, Jennifer might finally unclench. And if she would please stop pooping in Styrofoam cups like she’s conducting a science fair project, the online audience would stop peeing on ourselves from laughing. Get it together, Pumps. At least the saggin’ dragons are secured.

These women have been my morning oxygen for over a year. They are my people that are  hilarious. And, at times, inappropriate. Unfiltered. Compassionate. And petty in all the right places. If you’re a prude. Easily offended. Or still clinging to conservative Christianity where some Christians use scripture as a mascot for cruelty, this is not your ministry.

But if you’re like me a blue dot in a red state. A queer person whose family can’t quite figure out acceptance. Or someone who needs laughter more than judgment. These ladies feel like home. They are the family I needed. The humor I craved. And the reminder that democracy is worth fighting for even when surrounded by folks who think Jesus rode a dinosaur. And if island living as a blue dot in a red state is what it takes, then baby, I’ll take my new family without question.

So let me say this with the full force of my ancestors, my sass, my trauma, my cats, and my last functioning nerve. The I’ve Had It Podcast isn’t just entertainment. It’s survival. It’s community. It’s the comedic resistance movement for every marginalized person living in a state where Hobby Lobby aisles are filled with people who think equality is a threat to their throw pillows.

Jennifer, Pumps, and Kiley have built a refuge for the tired, the queer, the liberal, the fed‑up, the chronically sarcastic, and the spiritually dehydrated. They’ve given us permission to laugh at the absurdity of our political landscape. To call out hypocrisy with humor. And to find joy in the middle of a country that feels like it’s being run by people who failed eighth‑grade civics. And who ate boogers and glue but never outgrew those behaviors.

I will be a loyal gaytriot as long as these ladies are around. I will follow them into the trenches of democracy, petty grievances, and Pumps’ colon‑control journey. I will take this island living. This blue dot existence. And choose my new family without hesitation.

Thank you, ladies, for your humor, your compassion, and your unapologetic refusal to tolerate bullshit in this tumultuous time. You are the laughter that keeps us fighting. CACAW!!!! Mic dropped. Floor cracked. Humidity rising. Ancestors hollering, “That’s Right, Baby!” Thanks for reading! Please tune in every day to the I’ve Had It podcast for political news with lots of humor.

Affirmation: I honor my truth, humor, identity, and my chosen family. I choose joy. I choose community. And I choose to laugh loudly. Even in the places that try to silence me.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Why My Boundaries Offend People Who Benefited From My Lack of Them

“When you stop people‑pleasing, you don’t become unkind. You become un-owned.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Today we’re not just cleansing the air. We’re cleansing the generational rot that tried to bury us alive. While I also smile sweetly and was asked if I wanted more casserole.

There’s a special kind of exhaustion that comes from being raised in a culture where your worth is measured by how small you can make yourself. Where “good manners” means “don’t make anyone uncomfortable.” Even if you’re bleeding out emotionally. Where “respect” means “don’t you dare speak the truth out loud.” And the South? The South will hand you a monogrammed apron, a church bulletin, and a generational trauma starter pack before you can even walk. But today we’re unpacking all of it.

Let’s talk about people‑pleasing. Not the cute kind where you bring someone banana pudding because you love them. But the dangerous kind. The kind that rewires your nervous system. The kind that teaches you to abandon yourself so thoroughly that you forget you ever had needs in the first place.

People‑pleasing is not a personality trait. It’s a survival skill. A trauma response. A generational inheritance wrapped in a bow of “be sweet” and “don’t cause trouble.” And in the South, it’s practically a rite of passage.

We’re taught early don’t speak up. Don’t contradict. Don’t embarrass the family. Don’t make waves. Don’t question authority. Don’t tell the truth if the truth makes anyone uncomfortable. Don’t you dare put yourself first. That’s selfish. And for the love of all things holy, don’t let the church ladies hear you say “no.”

People‑pleasing becomes the currency of acceptance. The ticket to belonging. The price of being considered “good.” But here’s the sinister part. People‑pleasing trains you to betray yourself before anyone else even gets the chance. You learn to anticipate everyone’s needs but your own. You learn to apologize for existing. You learn to smile through pain so convincingly that even you forget you’re hurting. You learn to make yourself small enough to fit inside other people’s expectations. And the world, especially the Southern world, rewards you for it. Until you stop.

The moment you stop people‑pleasing. The moment you say “no,” or “that’s not okay,” or “I’m not doing that anymore.” The moment you choose yourself? Suddenly you’re the villain in a story you didn’t write. Suddenly you’re “difficult.” Suddenly you’re “ungrateful.” Suddenly you’re “too sensitive,” “too outspoken,” “too much,” “too emotional,” “too opinionated,” “too educated,” “too aware,” and “too alive.” But the truth is simple. You’re not too much. You’re just finally enough for yourself. And that terrifies people who benefited from your silence.

People‑pleasing is dangerous because it teaches you that your safety depends on your compliance. It teaches you that love must be earned through self‑abandonment. It teaches you that your needs are negotiable. But everyone else’s are sacred. When you grow up in a culture that worships politeness more than honesty. Appearances more than integrity. And reputation more than reality. You learn to disappear. Until one day, you don’t.

And here’s where it gets personal. This isn’t theory for me. This isn’t something I read in a book or heard in a podcast. This is lived experience that was carved into my bones. Stitched into my history. And dragged behind me for decades like a cross I never volunteered to carry.

On a personal note, my family marinated me in people‑pleasing my entire life. And when you don’t comply? You get labeled the troublemaker. The problem. The one who “changed.” The one who “thinks she’s better.” The one who “needs to calm down.” The one who “makes everything difficult.” But not teaching me boundaries while simultaneously demanding I people‑please was dangerous. Not inconvenient. Not uncomfortable. Dangerous.

I have almost died multiple times because I gave more of myself than I had to give. I was trained to prioritize everyone else’s happiness over my own survival. I was taught that my needs were optional. But their approval was oxygen. And in the South, it’s a shameful way of life to even question this dynamic.

I had to come to a point, not helped by their expectations, where I finally put myself first. And now that I have strong boundaries, my family and the community think I’m “nasty” because I tell them I don’t need their validation. They want me to “cow tow” to their needs while never expecting the same from them. And that, my friends, is the pinnacle of hypocrisy and controlling behavior. And at this point in my life, I can say with confidence that I’ll never allow myself to be controlled by someone else ever again.

Let me make this plain in a way even the most selectively‑forgetful, Bible‑thumping, reputation‑worshipping, boundary‑hating folks can understand. I am no longer available for my own destruction. I am no longer the family sponge soaking up everyone else’s dysfunction. I am no longer the emotional punching bag for people who refuse to face their own shadows. I am no longer the scapegoat for sins I didn’t commit. I am no longer the child who learned to survive by disappearing. I am no longer the adult who thought love meant self‑sacrifice. I am no longer the woman who begged for crumbs of acceptance from people who never learned how to love without conditions. I am done.

I’m done with the gaslighting. Done with the hypocrisy. Done with the “good Christian” performances. Done with the selective morality. done with the selective compassion. Done with the silence that protects abusers. Done with the shame that was never mine to carry. Done with the generational curses disguised as tradition. And done with the expectation that I should shrink so others can feel tall.

I am not here to make anyone comfortable. I am not here to uphold anyone’s illusion. I am not here to play the role they assigned me. I am not here to be palatable, agreeable, or quiet. I am here to live. Fully. Boldly. Truthfully. Unapologetically. And if my boundaries offend you? If my healing threatens you? If my voice rattles your cage? If my truth exposes your lies? That’s not my burden. That’s your mirror.

So let me end this with the clarity of a woman who has crawled out of the grave they dug for me. I didn’t lose my family. I lost my captors. I didn’t lose my community. I lost my chains. I didn’t lose my identity. I reclaimed it. And I will never, ever, ever hand it back. Lights out. Thanks for reading! To thine own self be true. What are your experiences with this?

Affirmation: My boundaries are sacred. My truth is valid. My life belongs to me now fully and forever.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Budtender Moment: Dirty Bird Strain Review

“Dirty Bird doesn’t chirp. It hums low. Settles deep. And reminds you that peace is a posture.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Today, we’re talking about a strain called Dirty Bird. It’s a strain that struts into the sesh like it owns the whole damn yard.

Dirty Bird is a hybrid with a swagger: balanced enough to keep you upright, bold enough to make you forget you ever had tension in your shoulders. This is porch‑sittin,’ gossip‑spillin,’ “tell me why the ancestors are tapping on the screen door again” weed.

Dirty Bird is a cross between Gelato 41 x GMO Cookies. Gelato 41 is a cross between Sunset Sherbet × Thin Mint GSC. GMO Cookies is a cross between Chemdawg × GSC. This family tree is basically a reunion where everyone brought something potent, delicious, and slightly chaotic. This strain tastes like a cold brew with a splash of sweet cream. A hint of earthy funk (the good kind, the “my cousin plays bass in a soul band” kind). Peppery spice on the exhale. And a lingering sweetness that feels like dessert you didn’t plan for but absolutely deserved.

Dirty Bird’s terpene trio hits like a Southern auntie with opinions. It’s a combination of Caryophyllene, Limonene, and Myrcene. Some grows also see Linalool represented. Together they create a vibe that’s equal parts “let’s talk about our feelings” and “let’s not do too much.” Dirty Bird helps with stress, mood, mild pain reduction, appetite, and social anxiety.

Please keep in mind that depending on differences in grows depends on what area of the country it is grown in. Ther will also be slight differences depending on when, where the plant was grown. Thanks for reading! And keep blazin.’ Have you tried this strain?

Affirmation: I honor my softness, strength, and the space between. I rise steady, grounded, and whole.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Budtender Moment: Pineapple Pizza Strain Review

“Balance isn’t about choosing one flavor. It’s about letting sweet and savory dance on the same tongue.”

-This Puzzled Life

 Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Today we’re talking about Pineapple Pizza. It’s the strain that proves cannabis genetics can be chaotic. Delicious. And slightly disrespectful to Italians all at once.

Pineapple Pizza is considered a 70/30 sativa-hybrid. It’s a cross between Scentuous × PuTang. Scentuous is a cross between Lemon Cheesecake × Purple Pineapple Express #4. Pu Tang is a cross between Star Pupil x Tangie. A true middle‑path strain that balances uplift with body ease, like a stoner trying to decide between yoga or DoorDash. The flavors are sweet grilled pineapple, sweet tomato, herbal cheese, pineapple, tropical notes, and a little tropical sunshine. It also has a finish that tastes like someone dropped a slice of pizza on a beach towel. But in a good way. When I first opened the flower it smelled completely like oregano. That’s not in the flavor profile. But it absolutely, also tasted like oregano.

The terpenes in this strain are terpinolene, myrcene, and limonene. Together they create a terpene symphony that says, “Yes, you can be both tropical and savory. Duality is real. Pineapple Pizza may support appetite, chronic fatigue, depression, stress, and nausea reduction. This is the strain you smoke when you want to feel like you’re on vacation but still need to fold laundry.

Please keep in mind that depending on differences in grows depends on what area of the country it is grown in. Ther will also be slight differences depending on when, where the plant was grown. Thanks for reading! And keep blazin.’ Have you tried this strain?

Affirmation: I honor my contradictions. I am allowed to be sweet, bold, weird, joyful, and whole all at once.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

The Stages of a Mental Health Spiral

“Sometimes the spiral isn’t a breakdown. It’s a plot twist.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Because the ancestors have pulled up lawn chairs. Piper is judging you from the counter. And your last functioning brain cell is wearing Crocs and screaming, “We’re fine.” Today, we’re about to roast our own mental health spiral like it’s Sunday dinner. And the ancestors are already circling the table whispering, “Lord, she’s doing that again.” Today’s sermon: The Stages of a Mental Health Spiral. This is not a gentle descent. This is a Six Flags drop tower operated by a raccoon with a GED and a dream.

You know that moment when you feel something is off? Not enough to call your therapist. But enough to stare at the wall like it owes you money. That’s when the spiral begins. Quietly. Softly. Like a Southern woman saying, “Bless your heart.”  Right before she ruins your life.

Behold, the official stages of a mental health spiral. The annotated. Dramatized. And spiritually supervised by your ancestors who are shaking their heads in unison.

1. Denial (a.k.a. “I’m fine.”)

You say “I’m fine” with the confidence of a toddler holding a permanent marker near a white couch. Your eye twitches. Your soul leaves your body. But you? You’re “fine.”

2. Snack-Based Coping

You open the fridge like it’s going to reveal the meaning of life. It does not. It reveals cheese. You eat the cheese. You feel nothing. You eat more cheese. You still feel nothing. You consider becoming cheese.

3. Googling Symptoms

You Google one minor sensation. “Why does my left eyebrow feel spicy?” 

Google: You have 14 minutes to live. 

You: “Reasonable.”

4. Texting Your Spouse

You send a message that is 40% panic. 40% apology. And 20% emojis that do not match the situation. Your spouse replies, “Did you eat today?” You did not. You lie anyway.

5. Bargaining With the Universe

You promise to drink water. You promise to stretch. You promise to stop doomscrolling. You do none of these things.

6. Existential Laundry

You stare at a laundry basket like it’s a metaphor for your entire life. You consider folding it. You do not fold it. You put a blanket over it like a Victorian ghost.

7. Deciding to Become a Forest Witch

You Google “how to disappear into the woods legally.” You imagine yourself living among moss, mushrooms, and emotionally stable squirrels. You start pricing cauldrons. You tell your spouse, “I’m going feral.” They say, “Okay, but text me when you get there.”

I told my therapist about the levels of decent into madness. She looked at me over her glasses like she’s trying to decide whether to laugh. Cry. Or call your ancestors for backup. She said, “Dana, you cannot diagnose yourself with 14 conditions. Eat a block of cheddar. And then attempt to join the woodland spirits. That’s not a treatment plan. That’s a Thursday.” Then she adds, “Next time, call me before you Google anything. Or before you buy a cauldron.”

And that, my friend, is the spiral. A journey. A pilgrimage. A spiritual hike through chaos, cheese, and questionable decisions. But you survived. You always do. Because even when my brain is doing NASCAR donuts in a Walmart parking lot, I still show up, I still laugh. And still threaten to become a forest witch at least twice a month. My ancestors are proud. My therapist is tired. My cats are unimpressed. And I’m doing amazing. Thanks for reading! What are things you do when you’re spiraling that isn’t funny at the time? But is now.

Affirmation: I can survive my own brain, one snack, one breath, and one dramatic monologue at a time.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

The Blood on Mississippi Soil: Why Silence Is No Longer an Option

“Silence is the oldest accomplice of violence. And Mississippi has been silent for far too long.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal, y’all. Because my ancestors are pacing the porch tonight. I can feel them in the humidity, the cicada buzz, and in the way the air gets thick right before a storm. They’re whispering. Tapping their feet. And shaking their heads the way old Southern aunties do when they’ve had enough of the foolishness. And Lord knows Mississippi has given us more than enough foolishness wrapped in Bible verses. Dipped in denial. And served with a side of “the South will rise again” delusion.

Because let’s tell the truth. The “Christian” community down here loves to shout about sin until it’s time to call out violence against Black bodies. Then suddenly everybody’s quiet. Clutching pearls. And humming hymns like silence is salvation. They’ll condemn a teenager’s skirt length before they condemn a system that keeps killing Black people. They’ll preach forgiveness while refusing accountability. They’ll talk about “God’s love” while ignoring the blood on their own soil. And I’m done pretending that’s holy.

Mississippi has always been a place where racism isn’t just a belief. It’s infrastructure. It’s policy. It’s tradition. It’s the foundation poured into the dirt generations ago. And too many folks still treat it like sacred ground.

And now, again, violence has come knocking at the doors of Black families. Again, the state government refuses to investigate. Again, accountability disappears when the killer is white. Again, we are told to “wait for the facts.” While the facts are buried under good ol’ boy politics and backroom handshakes.

A one-year-old Black baby was shot and killed by a white officer over diapers. Let me say that again. A baby died because a grown man with a badge felt threatened by diapers.

A Black teenage boy was found dead under mysterious circumstances. And instead of answers, we get a cover-up thicker than Delta mud. Evidence missing. Stories changing. Officials shrugging like a child’s life is just a paperwork inconvenience.

And now, a Black woman found hanging from a tree in 2026. And the state wants us to believe it’s anything other than what it looks like. Mississippi has a long, violent history with Black bodies and trees. We know what this is. We’ve seen it before. Our ancestors saw it before. And the silence from leadership is louder than any confession.

This isn’t coincidence. This isn’t isolated. This is a pattern, a legacy, and a sickness that Mississippi refuses to treat because too many people benefit from the infection. And let me tell you something. I’m old enough now to stand up and say it plainly. I’m old enough to fight for marginalized groups which include Black folks, brown folks, Indigenous folks, immigrants, and anyone who doesn’t fit the whitewashed mold Mississippi keeps trying to force us into. I’m old enough to say that I’m proud that I didn’t buy into the racist ideology that some of my own family members still cling to like it’s heirloom china.

I broke the cycle. I chose humanity over heritage. I chose truth over tradition. I chose justice over comfort. And if that makes me the black sheep at the family reunion, hand me the potato salad because I’ll graze in the pasture with pride. I’m proud to say I’m not like them. Not molded by their fear. Not shaped by their hate. Not carved into the same brittle statue of “tradition” they keep worshiping like it’s holy. I’m proud to say I crawled out of the same Mississippi clay. And still managed to grow in a different direction. And it was one that didn’t twist my roots around racism and call it heritage.

If rejecting their ideology means I lose my seat at the family table, then pull the chair out from under me. If refusing to swallow their silence means I’m no longer welcome in their church pews, then let the hymns echo without me. If choosing humanity over hypocrisy means I have to walk away from religion entirely, then I’ll walk away barefoot. Head high and unbothered.

Because I refuse to be loyal to a system that kills Black children and calls it “procedure.” I refuse to be loyal to a state that covers up Black death and calls it “ongoing investigation.” I refuse to be loyal to a community that sees a Black woman hanging from a tree and calls it “unfortunate.” I refuse to be loyal to people who hide behind scripture while ignoring suffering. I refuse to be loyal to any ideology that demands my silence while it destroys lives.

Mississippi may be built on racism. But I am not. Mississippi may cling to its racist past. But I do not. Mississippi may worship its own mythology. But I refuse to kneel. I am not like them. I will never be like them. And if breaking away from their beliefs is the cost of protecting my soul, integrity, and humanity, then that’s a price I’ll pay in full with no regrets.

Let them keep their “South will rise again” fantasies. I’m rising in a different direction. One they can’t touch. Can’t claim. And sure as hell can’t control. That’s my mic drop. And I won’t be picking it back up. Thanks for reading! What are your thoughts?

Affirmation: I honor my ancestors by refusing to repeat their pain. I stand in truth. I stand in courage. And I stand in love even when I stand alone.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Coping Skills I Learned on Social Media

“Healing is messy, hilarious, and inconvenient. And sometimes smells like essential oils.”

-This Puzzled Life

 Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Because today we are diving into the chaotic swamp of Coping Skills I Learned on Social Media. And according to the internet, all my trauma can be cured with a mason jar, a deep breath, and a girl named Moonbeam who lives in a van and sells chakra stickers on Etsy. Now with a special guest appearance from my therapist. She has thoughts, feelings, and possibly a migraine because of me.

I used to think coping skills were things you learned in therapy from trained professionals with degrees and clipboards. But no. Social media said, “Move over, licensed clinicians. We’ve got influencers with ring lights.” Suddenly my For You Page became a spiritual Walgreens. One swipe: grounding techniques. Next swipe: breathwork tutorials. Next swipe: “Put lavender oil on your forehead and tell your inner child she’s a baddie.” And listen. I tried them all. Because I’m nothing if not committed to healing. And also easily influenced by people who speak in soft voices and have plants.

1. Grounding Techniques (aka: Sensory Hide & Seek)

Social media told me to ground myself by naming five things I can see. So, there I was. Mid-anxiety spiral whispering, “A lamp. A cat. Another cat. A third cat A pile of laundry judging me. Did it help? Honestly yes. Because halfway through, Piper knocked over a cup. Coco screamed like a banshee. And Tinkerbell tried to eat the sage. Suddenly my anxiety had competition.

2. Breathwork (aka: Hyperventilating, but make it mindful)

Every influencer says the same thing, “Just breathe.” Ma’am I’ve been breathing. That’s the one thing I’ve consistently done since birth. But I tried the 4-6 method. Inhale for 4. Exhale for 6. Repeat until calm or until you pass out. And wake up spiritually refreshed.

At one point I inhaled so dramatically I sounded like a Victorian woman about to faint on a chaise lounge. Piper walked in and asked, “Are you okay or are you summoning something?” Honestly, both.

3. Lavender Oil Girl

There’s always one girl. She’s on every platform. She has perfect skin. A soft voice. And a house that looks like a Pinterest board. She says things like, “Lavender oil cured my generational trauma.” Ma’am my generational trauma is from the south. It has roots. It has acreage. It has a porch. Lavender oil is not strong enough. But I dabbed it on my wrists anyway because I’m weak and easily influenced. Did it cure my trauma? No. Did it make me smell like a Whole Foods aisle? Absolutely.

 4. The Cold-Water Trick

“Put your face in ice water to reset your nervous system.” I tried it. I dunked my whole face in a bowl like a Labrador retrieving a tennis ball. Did it help? Yes. Because for 30 seconds, I forgot every problem I’ve ever had.

5. My Therapist’s Opinion (aka: The Professional Sigh Heard ‘Round the World)

Now let’s talk about my therapist. She’s a woman with the patience of Job. The stamina of a kindergarten teacher. And the facial expressions of someone silently asking God for strength. When I told her I’d been practicing coping skills I learned on social media, she blinked three times. Which is the clinical equivalent of buffering and said, “Okay, let’s unpack that.” Which is therapist code for, “Lord, give me the strength not to laugh. Cry. Or quit my job.”

I explained the grounding, the breathwork, the lavender oil, the ice-water face dunking, and the inner-child pep talks. She nodded slowly like someone watching a toddler proudly show them a macaroni necklace. Then she said, “I’m glad you’re trying things. But maybe let’s add some skills that don’t involve drowning yourself in a mixing bowl.” Honestly? Fair.

So, what have I learned from social media coping skills? That healing is a buffet. Take what works. Leave what doesn’t. Laugh at the rest. Grounding helps. Breathwork helps. Lavender oil smells nice. And that girl on TikTok who cured her generational trauma? Good for her. My ancestors said I need something stronger. Like therapy, boundaries, hydration, and maybe a nap that lasts from now until next Tuesday.

But the truth is. If it brings you peace, even for a moment, it counts. Healing doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be yours. Mic drop. Lavender-scented, but still a mic drop. Thanks for reading! I hope you had a good laugh. Have you noticed any other random social media coping skills?

Affirmation: I am grounding. Breathing. Healing. And laughing my way 
through the chaos one lavender-scented coping skill at a time.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Budtender Moment: Banana Latte Strain Vape Cart Review

“Some flavors don’t just taste good. They remind you who you are.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Today we’re stepping into the warm, creamy dreamscape of one of my favorite flavor lanes on earth, banana. And when a vape cart leans into that banana latte fantasy, you already know I’m clocking in spiritually, emotionally, and botanically.

Banana Latte is a slightly leaning indica hybrid that keeps the mind bright enough to finish a sentence, a thought, or a grocery list. It is a cross between Banana OG × Café Mocha. Banana OG is a cross between OG Kush × Banana Kush. Café Mocha is a cross between Chocolope x Mochalope. Together they create a strain that tastes like your favorite barista is also your plug.

If a banana milkshake and a caramel latte had a baby and raised it in a warm greenhouse. This would be it. The flavors are creamy banana, light roasted coffee, sweet vanilla foam, and a whisper of nutty earth. That “Oh wait. This is delicious” moment that hits right behind the eyes.

The terpene profile Myrcene Caryophyllene Limonene. Some batches may also show Humulene for that earthy, roasted note that pairs beautifully with the coffee vibes. Patients use this strain for stress relief, body relaxation, mood elevation, emotional softening, mild pain, tension reduction creative focus with a warm, cozy mental glow.

And as always every grow, every region, every cultivator shifts the expression. Different soil, different sun, and different hands. And suddenly the banana leans sweeter. The coffee leans darker. Or the body effects lean heavier. That’s the magic of cannabis. The plant is alive. Responsive. And shaped by the land that raised it. Thanks for reading! And keep blazin.’ Have you tried this strain?

Affirmation: I welcome sweetness, warmth, and ease into my body. I allow myself to soften without losing my spark.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Budtender Moment: The Supp Cannabis Suppositories Review

“Sometimes wellness asks you to step outside your comfort zone. Sometimes it asks you to bend.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Because if I’m going to write a consumer review of cannabis suppositories, I need ambiance, courage, and at least one distraction so my brain doesn’t fully process what I willingly signed up for. And this is where your humble, curious, occasionally too-brave-for-my-own-good reviewer try products, so you don’t have to. Or so you can, but with emotional support.

Let me begin by saying that I did this for science. For wellness. For the blog. For the ancestors who whisper, “Baby, why?” every time I try something new. I purchased cannabis suppositories because I’d heard they were great for pain relief, menstrual discomfort, pelvic tension, and deep-body relaxation. And listen, Mississippi humidity already has me fighting for my life. So, I figured why not add one more adventure to the list.

The experience from this product goes like this:

  • Onset: Shockingly fast. Faster than edibles. Faster than me running when someone says, “We need volunteers.”
  • Effect: A warm, full-body calm. Like sinking into a heated massage chair that also whispers affirmations.
  • Discomfort: Minimal. The concept is the part that makes you stare at the wall for a moment and reconsider your choices.
  • Medical Usefulness: Legit. If you deal with cramps, pelvic pain, inflammation, or post-op discomfort, this is a serious option.
  • Recreational Usefulness: Only if you’re adventurous or trying to win a dare at a very strange cookout.

Unexpected side effects include a sudden desire to reorganize your life. A new respect for gravity. The realization that cannabis has officially entered every possible category of wellness. And the urge to text someone, “You will not believe what I just did.”

Let’s talk about anything else for a moment. Like how the Deep South humidity is currently thick enough to qualify as a personality trait. Or how the packaging for suppositories always looks suspiciously calm. Like it knows something you don’t. Or how the instructions are written in the gentlest tone possible. As if the manufacturer is patting your shoulder saying, “You’re doing amazing, sweetie.” Or how I lit charcoal at the beginning of this review like I was preparing for a ritual, because honestly? It felt appropriate.

This product includes:

  • THC 10 mg
  • Intended medical uses (cramps, pelvic pain, inflammation, post-op relief): This will work with any condition. And they are great for people who have a difficult time swallowing. You can still get the relief and not have to eat an edible. I use this for severe chronic spine pain due to pinched nerves and degenerative disc disease.
  • Effects seem to last for a few hours. I never got high. However, some have said that they do get a buzz. I just go relief which was the goal
  • Dosage is one suppository
  • Melt speed (important!) is incredibly fast.
  • Storage instructions (usually refrigeration): I keep mine in the freezer.
  • Any warnings or medical considerations: if there is anything you are concerned about or need clarification, ask your budtender or doctor.

Thanks for reading! And just to let you know, this adventure was worth the relief. Have you tried this product? And how well did it work for you?

Affirmation: I honor my healing, curiosity, and my ability to laugh through the awkward parts.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Top Cannabis Strains For Pain

“Pain may knock on the door. Cannabis decides whether it gets to stay for supper.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Let the ancestors pull up a chair. Today we’re talking about pain relief that doesn’t require you to sell your soul to Big Pharma. Pain is a thief. It steals sleep, joy, mobility, and sometimes your entire personality. Cannabis when chosen with intention, can be a gentle usher guiding your body back toward ease. Below is a lineup of strains that have earned their reputation as pain‑relief heavy hitters. Each with its own personality, terpene backbone, and Southern‑approved charm.

1. GMO (Garlic Cookies)

GMO walks in smelling like a truck stop garlic knot and a diesel spill had a baby. And that’s exactly why she works.

  • Type: Indica-dominant
  • Terpenes: Caryophyllene, limonene, myrcene
  • Why it helps: Deep body relaxation, anti-inflammatory support, and a slow, heavy melt that turns sharp pain into background static.
  • Vibe: “I’m not moving. But I’m also not mad about it.”

2. OG Kush

The classic. The blueprint. The strain that taught half the country what “body high” even means.

  • Type: Hybrid
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, limonene, caryophyllene
  • Why it helps: Full-body relief with a mood lift that keeps you from spiraling into pain frustration.
  • Vibe: Porch swing therapy with a side of emotional stability.

3. Ice Cream Cake

Sweet, creamy, and deceptively powerful like a Southern auntie who hugs you too tight but also hands you a casserole.

  • Type: Indica
  • Terpenes: Limonene, caryophyllene, linalool
  • Why it helps: Muscle relaxation, nerve pain support, and a sedating finish perfect for nighttime relief.
  • Vibe: Weighted blanket for your skeleton.

4. Runtz

Don’t let the candy name fool you. Runtz is a pain-relief ninja wrapped in tropical fruit perfume.

  • Type: Balanced hybrid
  • Terpenes: Caryophyllene, limonene, humulene
  • Why it helps: Smooth, even relief without couch-lock, ideal for daytime pain management.
  • Vibe: “I can function again, praise be.”

5. Slurricane

If your pain is loud. Slurricane is louder.

  • Type: Indica
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, caryophyllene, pinene
  • Why it helps: Heavy sedation, deep muscle relaxation, and a mental quiet that chronic pain sufferers rarely get.
  • Vibe: A storm that knocks out the power in a good way.

6. Harlequin

For folks who want relief without feeling like they’ve been spiritually launched into orbit.

  • Type: CBD-rich sativa
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, pinene, caryophyllene
  • Why it helps: Anti-inflammatory support with clear-headed functionality.
  • Vibe: “I can still answer emails. But my back isn’t screaming.”

7. Blueberry

A berry-scented lullaby for nerve pain, migraines, and tension.

  • Type: Indica
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, pinene
  • Why it helps: Soothing, calming, and perfect for winding down after a long day of fighting your own joints.
  • Vibe: A rocking chair on a screened-in porch at dusk.

8. Death Star

A galactic pain assassin with diesel fumes strong enough to baptize your sinuses.

  • Type: Indica‑dominant hybrid
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, caryophyllene, limonene
  • Why it helps: Deep muscle relaxation. Anti‑inflammatory support. And a slow, space‑drifting calm that turns chronic pain into cosmic background noise.
  • Vibe: “I have left Earth. Y’all handle things down there.”

9. Master Kush

Old‑school, no‑nonsense, “I came here to shut your pain up” energy.

  • Type: Indica
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, caryophyllene, humulene
  • Why it helps: Strong body sedation. Nerve pain relief. And a grounding calm that feels like someone unplugged your stress at the wall.
  • Vibe: A weighted blanket. A stern talking‑to. And a nap all at once.

10. Papaya

Tropical, funky, and surprisingly potent. The strain equivalent of a beach vacation where you actually rest.

  • Type: Indica‑leaning hybrid
  • Terpenes: Myrcene, caryophyllene, linalool
  • Why it helps: Smooth, full‑body relief with a dreamy mental float that’s perfect for chronic pain flare‑ups.
  • Vibe: “I’m not ignoring my responsibilities. I’m healing.”

So, the next time pain tries to run your life like it pays rent remember this. You’ve got options. You’ve got allies. And you’ve got strains that hit harder than a Southern grandma’s side-eye. Choose your medicine with intention. And let relief find you like it’s been looking for you all along. Thanks for reading! Keep blazin.’ What are your opinions about these strains?

Affirmation: “My body deserves relief. My spirit deserves rest. And I welcome healing in every form that supports my peace.”

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife