parenting teens

darnold1975

When Purity Culture Protects Predators: The Duggar Edition

“If your righteousness collapses the moment accountability arrives, it was never righteousness. It was camouflage.”

-This Puzzled Life

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Today we’re grilling up a fresh batch of religious hypocrisy “Duggar‑style.” That special brand of “family values” where the skirts are long. The hair is crunchy. And the list of sex crimes is longer than the Old Testament. You’d think a family with 19 kids and a camera crew would’ve spent at least five minutes teaching their sons that maybe the real sin isn’t masturbation. It’s molesting children. But no. No, no, no. The Duggar doctrine has always been, “Touching yourself is evil. But touching your sisters? Well, let’s pray about it.”

And now here we are again. Another Duggar son, this time Joseph. Has been making headlines for the same nightmare behavior that already sent Josh Duggar, his brother, to prison. After Josh was found guilty of possessing child sexual abuse material and sentenced in 2022. A family tree so rotten it’s practically compost. And the wildest part? These aren’t drag queens. These aren’t queer folks. These aren’t immigrants. These aren’t the people conservative Christians love to foam at the mouth about. Nope. It’s straight, white, right‑wing, Bible‑thumping men. Yet again, harming children while preaching purity like they invented it.

Meanwhile the kids they violated? They’re left with trauma that doesn’t get a sentence reduction. A parole hearing. Or early release for “good behavior.” They carry it forever. In their bodies. In their nervous systems. In the quiet moments nobody else sees. But sure. Tell me again how queer people are the threat? Tell me again how trans folks using the bathroom is the downfall of civilization? Tell me again how cannabis is the devil’s lettuce while your sons are out here committing crimes that shatter childhoods?

At this point, the Duggar brand of Christianity is so tainted it needs a hazmat label. Everything they’ve preached about morality, purity, and righteousness has evaporated like holy water on a hot skillet. Their “faith” isn’t faith. It’s a costume. A prop. A shield for predators who hide behind scripture while desecrating everything it claims to stand for.

And the saddest part? There are still people who will defend them. Still people who will twist themselves into theological pretzels to excuse the inexcusable. Still people who will say, “Well, nobody’s perfect.” As if imperfection and predation are the same category. They aren’t. They never will be. Some things are unforgivable. Some things stain a soul so deeply that no amount of prayer, repentance, or PR spin can scrub it clean.

And if the most powerful seat in the nation can be held by someone repeatedly accused of harming women and children, it’s no wonder his supporters think this behavior is normal. It’s no wonder they defend it. It’s no wonder they minimize it. When your leader models entitlement, cruelty, and moral decay, the flock follows.

And here’s the part nobody in their starched‑collar, Bible‑thumping echo chamber wants to hear. The one they can’t sermonize away. Children deserve safety. Children deserve protection. Children deserve a world where their bodies are not battlegrounds for someone else’s power, lust, or theology. And anyone who violates that? Anyone who destroys a child’s sense of safety? Anyone who weaponizes religion to excuse it? They’ve forfeited the right to be seen as righteous. They’ve forfeited the right to be believed. They’ve forfeited the right to preach about morality ever again.

If your faith can’t protect children from your own men, it’s not faith. It’s a cover‑up with a choir. You don’t get to preach purity while you and your sons are out here shattering childhoods. You don’t get to weaponize scripture against queer folks. While ignoring the predators in your own pews. You don’t get to call yourselves “God’s chosen family.” When the only thing you’ve consistently produced is trauma, denial, and a PR team working overtime.

Because the truth is simple. If your faith collapses the moment accountability walks into the room, it was a costume stitched together with shame, silence, and selective morality. And the children you failed? They will grow up carrying scars your sermons can’t erase. They will spend years rebuilding safety you stole. They will learn to trust themselves again in a world you taught them was dangerous. When the danger was sitting at your own dinner table.

Meanwhile, the men who harmed them will keep hiding behind the same religion they desecrated. Counting on the same community that protected them. And quoting the same verses they never lived by. Truth doesn’t care about your reputation. It doesn’t care about your brand. It doesn’t care about your “family values” photo ops. It shows up loud, uninvited, and holding receipts.

And once it arrives, there’s no going back. No amount of prayer circles, modesty lectures, or “thoughts and prayers” statements can un‑rot a tree that’s been diseased from the roots. So let the world take note. It wasn’t drag queens. It wasn’t trans folks. It wasn’t immigrants. It wasn’t the communities you demonize. It was your own men. Again. And again. And again.

And if that truth makes your theology crumble? Good. Let it fall. Let it burn. Let it clear the ground for something that actually protects children instead of protecting predators. Because at the end of the day, the only thing more dangerous than a man who harms children, is a community that refuses to hold him accountable. And if your religion can’t tell the difference between righteousness and abuse, then it’s not holy. It’s a hiding place. Thanks for reading! And do your part to protect our children.

Affirmation: I honor truth. Protect the vulnerable. And refuse to let anyone hide abuse behind faith, power, or fear.

***Don’t forget to watch the video!***

#ThisPuzzledLife

darnold1975

Most Dangerous Internet Challenges Part 3

“Getting information from the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant.”

-Mitchell Kapor

Thanks for coming back to read the final blog about the Most Dangerous Internet Challenges. I have saved the most dangerous of all the challenges I’ve talked about until now. That does not mean that I’m being insensitive to the destruction that the previous ones have caused. However, for varied reasons these last four challenges go down as my top for being some of the most dangerous. Let’s continue…

Skull Breaker Challenge

This is a dangerous challenge that first made its mark on Tik Tok in 2020. I’m not saying that the behavior itself has never been conducted before. Because I’m fairly sure that when I was a teen, we did something similar. The participants work as a group of three. One person stands in the middle, while the other two stand on either side. They tell the middle person to jump up and then very swiftly use a sweeping kick so that the middle person falls to the ground and hits their head. Injuries that have been associated with this challenge include concussion, neck, head and spinal injuries. Skull fractures and paralysis are also known to be associated with this challenge. Tik Tok very quickly took down any videos related to the challenge.

Benadryl Challenge

This is a challenge where it involves taking massive amounts of Benadryl in order to get high and hallucinate. Ok, stop for a second. We didn’t even have internet challenges much less this one. Hell, I did this just to escape my own horrible reality. But you can only take so much before the “high” isn’t a really pleasant experience. However, when you don’t have access to money, as a young teen, you go to the next best place, the parents’ medicine cabinet. 

I’m not trying to glorify this. What I am saying is that there are many varied reasons why someone would do something like this. While this can be deadly, I never considered those dangers as a teen. The overconsumption of this medication can lead to confusion, delirium, psychosis, organ damage, hyperthermia, convulsions coma and death. And sadly, there have been children and teens who did not live to see the next internet challenge.

Blackout Challenge

Ok. This one right here has been known to be my poison. The Blackout Challenge also called the “Choking Game” are another one of those things that have thrill seekers mouths watering with anticipation. I had no idea that this had a formal name for behavior until I started seeing this in news reports. The challenge formally began to gain widespread attention on Tik Tok in 2021. It’s a challenge that deprives the brain of oxygen and blocks blood from entering the brain.

Oxygen deprivation of the brain has the potential to cause moderate to severe brain cell death. And because fatalities are often ruled as suicides, it makes the statistics unreliable. I think we all can agree that this can be dangerous. One of the reasons that it’s so popular is because it costs zero dollars to try. As dangerous as it can be, I don’t see this behavior being eradicated. 

My personal beginning with this behavior was born out of a very traumatic situation. And I can tell you that the longer kids get their needs met in this way, the more difficult it is to stop. And just like any type of self-harm that serves a purpose for the individual, the results can be deadly.

I completely understand that not every child looks for some type of emotional need to be met with these behaviors. Either way no one can deny the facts about the statistics showing that it can be deadly. I can admit that this isn’t “brain food” and is still considered very stupid to most people. The main thing is for parents to be aware of the signs that are related to this behavior which include discussion of the game, bloodshot eyes, marks on the neck, severe headaches, disorientation after spending time alone, ropes, scarves and belts tied to bedroom furniture or doorknobs or knotted on the floor and unexplained presence of things like dog leashes, choke collars and bungee cords.

Blue Whale Challenge

The Blue Whale Challenge is one that I consider to be very insidious. If you’ve read my recent blog about the online predatory group 764, this is one that’s eerily reminiscent. It was an online social phenomenon in 2016 that began in Russia and claimed to exist in many countries. The game consists of a series of tasks to players over a 50-day period. 

In its start, the creator who was a former Russian psychology student, got expelled from the university. He said that he originally created the game in 2013 in order to “clean society of biological wastes.” The tasks begin with things like “get up at 4:30 am”  or “watch a horror movie” before moving into self-harm. And the end of the game involves committing suicide. The administrators were found to be children aged between 12 and 14 years of age. 

In June 2018, Russian financial analyst, Nikita Nearonov was arrested for masterminding the game. Nearonov is suspected of grooming ten underage girls in order for them to commit suicide. The game has been reported to be banned in countries including Egypt, Kenya and Pakistan. However, experts agree that it’s almost impossible to ban the game.

I hope this series has been informative on some of the dangerous internet challenges. For all the ones that have diminished, there are new challenges in ten-fold waiting to take their place. Remembering how naïve I was as a teen helps me to realize that had the internet been as big then as it is now, I would’ve surely gotten hurt at the very least. I was incredibly impulsive and searching for something to distract me from life as it was. Thanks for reading! 

***Don’t forget to watch the video***

#Thispuzzledlife