“Time spent with cats is never squandered, it’s ‘purr’fect!”
-Unknown
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. I’ve told you how bad my girls are at playing hide-and-seek. And Piper is no different. Apparently, she and her sisters have been discussing how to play the game. Piper was so excited to show me what she had learned. I held my breath and prepared for the negative impact. And well….she might also have deficits in this area of her life. Read our conversation and draw your own conclusion on the future of my cats and their abilities to play a commonly played childhood game known as Hide-And-Seek. I am busy writing, and I overhear the girls talking about playing the game. So, I listen closer. Check out this interaction.
Coco: “Here let me show you what I’m talking about. Always remember, if you can’t see them, they can’t see you.”
Tink: “Yea. It’s pretty easy when you get the hang of it. I don’t know why momma got us a tutor.”
(The girls show Piper their version of the game.)
Piper: “Oh yes! I’ve got it now. But momma always tells me that I’m wrong.”
Coco: “Piper, one thing you have to understand is that we allow momma to think she’s right. But we do our own thing anyway. Except when she says, “TREAT OR COOKIE.” Then, we just act insanely happy and meow as much and as loud as you can. Those are the rules.”
Tink: “You have to train momma. She brings me my treats, or she throws them to me. And it’s really fun when she puts them all over the house for us to find. Then we show her who are the real stars of the game. It’s not about what’s true. It’s all about what is perceived.”
Piper: “Wow! Did momma teach you that?”
Tink: “No, the president did.”
Me: “Hold up girls! What are you talking about?”
Coco: “We were just teaching Piper how to play hide-and-seek.”
Me: “But ya’ll don’t even know how to hide appropriately.”
Coco: “Well, we are working with a tutor.”
Me: “True you are. But I think we need someone who will push you harder.”
Piper: “But I’m learning how to play.”
Me: “Ok. Show me what you’ve got.”
(They form a huddle and talk in private.)
Coco: “Ok. Ready. Break! Momma start counting.”
They all take off looking for the perfect hiding spot.
Me: “7…8…9…10! Ready or not, here I come!”
Everything is eerily quiet.
Coco:
Tink:
Piper:
Me: “I found all of you!”
Coco: “Piper, run like you stole something!”
Tink: “I concede to defeat.”
Me: “Really Tink?! Why?”
Tink: “Because I want to take a nap now.”
Piper: “I made it back to the base. Do we get a cookie now?
Coco: “Cookies? Who said, “Cookies? Meow! Meow!”
Piper: “Meow! Meow! Meow!”
Me: “Girls, that doesn’t mean that you get treats!”
Coco and Piper: “Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!”
Me: “Girls, hush!”
Coco and Piper: “Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!”
Me: “Ok! Ok! Just hush!”
Coco: “See, you play the game just like that, Piper. Everyone is a winner!”
Tink: “Momma, please bring me my treats!”
Me: “Fine just be quiet.”
Coco: “Winner. Winner. Chicken cookie dinner!”
As you can see, the girls have their own agenda. And please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we try to survive as a family. Thanks for reading!
“In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.”
-Terry Pratchett
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk to you about what it’s like living with Piper. She is finally coming into her own and getting bigger every day. Check this out!
Piper: “Momma help me!”
Me: “What is the problem, Piper?”
Piper: “Tink bit my butt for no reason!”
Me: “Did you do anything to her?”
Piper: “No! She just bit me for no reason!”
Tink: “Piper you cowabungaed my head!”
Piper: “No I didn’t! Fluff off!”
Tink: “What did you say? You little feline fluff ball?”
Piper: “I promise! I did nothing wrong!”
Me: “Piper, the collected evidence shows that you, in fact, jumped on Tink’s head without provocation.”
Piper: “Momma, I’m just a little kitty!”
Me: “And you are responsible for your own kitty actions.”
Tink: “Ha! Ha! I told you, you little snack stealer!”
Piper: “Momma said that I was growing and needed more than anyone else.”
Me: “Piper, I did not! Coco, do you care to chime in?”
Coco: “Hear no evil. See no evil. Speak no evil.”
Piper: “Well, that’s what I heard you say.”
Me: “When, ma’am?”
Piper: “The other night when I was asleep.”
Me: “Piper, that must’ve been while you were dreaming.”
Piper: “Well, you still said it no matter if I was awake or asleep.”
Me: “Piper, you must share your snacks just like you want me to share everything that I eat.”
Piper: “Well, I’m just curious and want to know what you’re eating?”
Me: “By jumping on me and into my plate?”
Piper: “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”
Thanks for reading! Life with my girls is full of laughs and love. They are my family. Keep moving forward and always spay and neuter you pets.
Affirmation: I deserve every snack and piece of food that I find.
The following is a situation that led to Coco growling for the first time ever. She wanted to let her inner mountain lion loose. But all she was able to do was squeak like a mouse. Tink also tried and was only able to connect with a very light meow. “We just don’t feel safe with them as protectors.”
They didn’t even try to save me from one tiny moth. The best that either of them could do was look at it. No warning, no gang signs, no saying “You need Jesus!!! Nothing!!!!!”
Ok that was harsh but not really. It was my fault for zooming in on the picture and making it look like a dinosaur from Jurassic Park.
(We don’t know that cat.)
When it was actually the size of a quarter. Or maybe a dime depending on the angle. And we are assuming that the lizard was female because none of us saw lizard balls. And we don’t actually know if lizards have balls. But if they do we don’t know where they are kept. Maybe at an alternate address. We took a vote and named her “Lizzie the Lezzie.” Not to be confused with the real “Lizzy the Lezzie.”
I looked up after about an hour of scurrying to find Coco and Tink with bewildered looks on their faces and pawing at the lifeless reptile. Coco said, “Momma!!!!! We need to change the batteries out.” I had to explain to her that this was not a situation that batteries could fix.” Coco was very upset that Lizzie was dead. She was crying and saying, “Momma, I didn’t want to unalive her. I was just playing with her.” I told her, “Baby I know. You just played with her to death.”
We later found out that males are the ones that flash that piece of pink skin. That was like puffing out their chest. And we thought the whole time that the lizard was blowing bubbles because she was chewing watermelon bubble gum.
We are all in therapy and trying to work things out. Coco and Tink got some tutoring sessions in aggression and have progressed to a light hiss and a paw in the air and learning how to call a bluff. One night they alerted me to a possible intruder. It was a 2” moth holding a shank. And a pregnant gnat with an attitude. I told Coco, “get to it sister, this one is yours.”
The last time I saw them Tink had moved onto other things. And Coco was still grieving and processing the trauma. She is working with a therapist that really knows her stuff. And her therapist doesn’t allow Coco to deflect the painful issues. She will, however, guide her through it with a crappy little nudge from a therapeutic assignment.
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today I want to tell you about a situation that involved Tink and Coco. They both have dreams of being big cats one day. I don’t have the heart to challenge their realities. So, I just let them dream away. On this particular day I let them express just that. Check this out!
I woke up one morning with the familiar feeling of a fat cat running back and forth across me. This usually Coco’s meaning of “Momma get up!” I sit up and take a few minutes to gather myself for yet another day. Tinkerbell is gently licking my toes. I then feel pain and start sweating. I ask her. “Tink! What are you doing?!” “Momma, I licked your toes so clean and then I wanted to chew on them.” “Listen here! Don’t you ever use your back teeth to lick my feet!” I stand up limping towards their food bowls.
Tink: “Yippee she’s going to feed us! Momma, I want a gazelle to eat like the big cats on Netflix.
Me: “Have you and coco been watching National Geographic shows?”
Tink: “Yes ma’am. We could eat it just like they do.”
Me: “Tink there is nothing about you or coco that could take down a gazelle. Except maybe the fumes coming from your litter box. How would you get one to here at our house?”
Tink: “Momma DoorDash….duh.”
Me: “I’m quite sure they don’t deliver life size gazelles. What would you do if you got one? Lick its toes, run across it and throw paws with its hair? Ya’ll don’t even stalk anything but brown leaves, bugs and each other. “
Wanting to prove that she is like a big cat, I soon see Tinkerbell crouch down and ready to pounce at any moment. I couldn’t see what the target was, but I just watched curiously.
Tink: “Watch me catch my prey!”
She shakes her butt a little and then off she goes trying to be the big cat of her dreams. She lands on her target and quickly jumps back off it. When I finally see what she found She asks me
Tink: “Momma, what do you think? I killed my prey!”
Me: “Yes, Tinkerbell did kill it. The ice cube is dead.”
I know that this one was lighthearted. And to be honest, I need to remind myself every now and then about the comical simplicity of life. They help me so much, in fact, that I want to share them with as many who want to enjoy some of their funny comforts. My animals have always been the compassion in life that I couldn’t seem to find at one time. And the relationship that I have with them is so much fun. I hope that you can enjoy some of what I love about my girls, Tink and Coco. Thanks for reading!
Affirmation of cats: There is no one in the world that I would rather be.
“Cats have nine lives-three for playing, three for straying, and three for staying.”
-English Proverb
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk to you about the continued struggles with my cats and playing “hide-and-seek” troubles.
I had hope when Piper joined our family that the remedial work would be successful. However, my girls will probably always be deficient in this area of their lives. I will now show you some of their efforts trying to change their ways. Sadly, they are still coming up short.
Thanks for reading. And keep me and the girls in your thoughts and prayers as we are always looking for solutions to this cat-tastrophy.
Affirmation: You are beautiful. It’s a good day to be a cat.
“If mugs made fart noises coffee shops wouldn’t be relaxing, they’d sound like a yoga class in a retirement home.”
-Desi Lydic
Me and my cats have a nightly routine that consists of me taking my meds while Tink is at my feet watching my every move. And stares at me hoping to make me hurry along. I then Get comfortable in my recliner and cover up with my favorite blanket. Then Tink hops in my lap where we both cuddle until we’re both asleep. Except on nights when I’m scrapbooking. And then both of the girls fall asleep wherever they are. Usually, Coco is in her bed and Tink is in my recliner on my blankets. Anyway, here’s how one of our nights unfolded.
Me: “Tink wake up.”
Tink: “Mi no Habla ingles.”
Me: “Well, Rosetta Stone you better find a way to talk to me.”
Tink: “I’m sleeping.”
Me: “No you’re not you just spoke to me.”
Tink: “I talk in my sleep.”
Me: “Wake up or I will get the thermometer and check to see if you have a fever.”
Tink: “I’m up. What do you need?”
Me: “Tink, hold on omg was that you?! You are nasty!! You farted!!!! Tink, that one is really bad. You know I can’t take bad smells. Dear God, what did you eat?! Oh, Holy Hell it’s burning my eyes too. What are your farts made of? Napalm?”
Tink: “Your big baby stop your whining it’s just your allergies. And you woke me up from my sleep and I didn’t have the energy to hold it in.”
Me: “I know. I’m allergic to cat farts. I can’t take crop dusting any better than this. Omg now I taste it! I started gagging. I had a sudden flashback to diaper days. You and your brother Copeland are the worst smelling animals on this planet! Wait until I tell him how nasty you are.”
Tink: “Fine tell him. He’s the one who taught me how to fart!”
Me: “You need to be bathed in a tub of Holy water because you have a demon in your butt. Dear God get out of my lap and off my blanket!! You probably cinged the fibers. Oh, I just threw up a little in my mouth. Find my airplane vomit bag NOW!!!!”
Tink: “Fine me and Copeland will go live with coach.”
Me: “Ummmm….I wouldn’t dare do that to her!!”
Tink: “She would, at least let me process my feelings about it.”
Sarcastically
Me: “So what are your feelings?”
Tink: “I feel that I’m a flatulent genius.”
Me: “No! Nope, nope, nope! Not even funny, Tink. Why would you want to subject coach to your farts? I thought you liked her.”
Tink: “Well you share everything with her so I thought that I would share everything too.”
Me: “Tink, I do not talk to her about farting!”
Tink: “You talk to her about being constituted.”
Me: “That’s constipated. And I told her that I almost died. It was a traumatic event.”
Tink: “Really?! There was no need to let her in on that part of your life. She likes me more than she likes you, anyway. I don’t understand why you’re being so dramatic.”
Me: “Tink I almost lost my life! I was in the middle of hostage negotiations with my poop chute, and I saw the grim reaper! The whole event scared me to death. And I will not compete for our coach with a cat! You know that she’ll call the police to come and do welfare check on me. And then I’d have to go to the ER and deal with idiots.”
Tink: “It was just a little poop ghost. The poop fan is on.”
Me: “There is nothing about that fart that is little. And no that’s our living room fan and all it does is swirl that weapon of ass destruction all over the house. And it sticks to everything. The whole house smells like I’ve been cooking with dookie tonight!”
Tink is now overcome with laughter.
Me: “A poop fan takes it out of the house. And you can tell your “ghost” that it needs a tic tac or an altoid because it has some crappy dragon breath. Plus, the police officers would arrest you for endangering the life of a vulnerable adult.”
Tink: “Well, I’ve been watching Cops, and I know when I’m supposed to start running. I refuse to be put in handcuffs!!”
Me: “They wouldn’t use handcuffs. They would bring Animal Control and use a rabies pole.”
Tink: “Outta my way momma that’s my cue to start running!”
Ever since then I have been thinking of a way to conduct a “Shock and Awe” moment. I’ve been waiting for a good fart to get her back. So, one day I waited until she was in a deep sleep. I snuck up on her like I was in some type of special forces unit. Operation: “Methane Freebie” was almost over. I got into position close to my target and I Let Her Rip!!! She got vertical at that very moment. I couldn’t help but laugh. With her eyes wide open and her tail all fluffed out she said
Tink: “What in the “Holy Crap on a Cracker” what was that?”
Hysterical Laughter
Me: “I just spoke your “love language.”
Tink: “That was not love, Momma! Had you been a man I would’ve clawed you right in the pickle.”
Me: “Yes it was your “love language.” That was me blowing you a kiss.”
Tink: “I want a divorce!”
I hope you’ve enjoyed this lighthearted post. This was not fiction. My cats and I actually have conversations like this. Thanks for reading! And keep smiling!
Affirmation: If my cat’s flatulence is excessive, I will consult with a veterinarian to rule out any underlying medical conditions.
This is a story I wrote about Coco and her mean school teacher, Ms. Beans.
Ewww that mean old teacher named Ms Beans. That wasn’t her real name. That was just a nickname we called her because she would “crop dust” the whole class. We all started gagging the longer it was alive. Why?! Because she would close the door taking away what little ventilation we were getting. But I would always tell her that I had a hairball condition when she would ask me why I was gagging. We couldn’t exactly raise our paws and say, ”Ms Fart I’ve got a question.” So me and my classmates just called her ms beans.
Actual name is Truffles the Cat
You know I heard that they found her dead in her litter box due to an explosion. May her mean ass be comforted and corrected by tha Jesus. If not, may tha Jesus kick her out of heaven and send with her a bottle of water and suntan lotion to the red light in the ground.
“Sometimes the goal is to just survive, and the memories are a bonus.”
-Unknown
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk to you about the holidays and family. Don’t worry. It also gives me gas at the thought of the two, once again, colliding.
This should be a happy time for most of us. However, especially in our current political climate, I would venture to say that the thought of interacting with family members who stand on the opposite of the isle makes me want to step out into oncoming traffic. So, this year, I’ll be spending most of my holiday time with the only ones that seem trustworthy, my boys and my cats.
My cats could care less about what the current political environment is like. And they also don’t care whether I’m straight or gay. And unlike some of my family members, all they want to do is spend every waking hour with me. With all of my quirkiness, they just seem to keep scrolling as none of that matters to them.
My boys and I will spend time together during their school break. Activities include burning leaves and wood at the fire pit, roasting wieners and marshmallows, and cuddling in the cool night air while talking about the newest and most concerning issues of being a child. And I will, more than likely, be pummeled by nerf gun bullets sometime during their stay.
We never have enough money to do everything that we want to do. But what we do have is each other. They devour every bit of food available. And at the end of the day, they are my children, and I am their mom. The cats are their sisters. There is absolutely nothing that can compare to that.
By the end of their stay, the cats are tired of being nice and the boys are tired of being nice to each other. And I am, once again, interested in a little bit of quiet time. No matter how tired and irritated we can get, me and the boys experience the true meaning of family. And that’s what it’s all supposed to be about. Not judging someone for who they are versus who they are not. Thanks for reading! And enjoy your time with family in whatever way that takes shape.
Affirmation: I will approach this holiday with the same calm wisdom I use to navigate family debates over the thermostat.
“Pawsitively bewitched by my furry friend’s cuteness.”
-Unknown
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to talk to you about not forgetting our pets on Halloween. They secretly despise you for the costumes that you pick out. All they wanted was to be a part of the family. And they had no idea that they would be subject to such cruelty. Poor them. I don’t find any of that cruelty. I love seeing our pets dressed up as almost anything. Here are a few of these pets and their personal opinions concerning Halloween costumes. See if you agree. In
Snoop Dogg
“Fo shizzle my nizzle.”
Colin Oscopy
“Dr Patio Furniture ER Stat!”
Charlie
“A cow?! With utters?! I’m eating the couch pillows when we get home.”
Pudding
“Seriously? I have my head in a hamburger right now?!”
Sister Mary Clarence
“May God forgive you for your sin of dressing me up as a nun.”
Wendy
“How do you live with yourself?”
Jess Kidding
“Let me tell you all the reasons why I hate you.”
Nico Time
“What in the absolute Hell have you done?!”
Cheetolini
“You should go to prison!”
“The Angry Yam”
“You should go to prison twice!”
Power Serge
“A Beanie Baby?! Please tell me it isn’t so.”
Capital Splatter
“I AM CHUCKY!”
Perv Griffins
“This is your fetish! Not mine!”
Rocky and Apollo
“We are calling the ASPCA!”
Thanks for reading! Happy Halloween to you and your pets. Happy Haunting!
Affirmation: I am worthy despite my owner/owners ideas about costumes.
“The connection between domestic violence and animal cruelty is so significant that it is commonly referred to simply as “the Link.” Perpetrators of domestic violence often threaten harm or bring actual harm to their victims’ pets in order to control them, keep victims from leaving, or to punish them for actually leaving or attempting to leave.”
-ASPCA.org
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to discuss domestic violence and pets. I won’t pretend that this topic is going to be easy to digest. However, it’s one that needs to be brought into the light.
Many of us sometimes love our animals more than people. I know, speaking only for myself, that my animals have always been a source of comfort, unconditional love, and understanding that many people can’t fully embody. They have never spoken a word as their compassion is in their eyes. And all they ask for is to be fed and also loved in return. That is, it. Nothing more. Nothing less.
My personal experience with domestic violence is knowing that absolutely nothing is off limits. And it is their cruelty that can always get worse. Do some abusers change? Yes. But if they are not willing to do self-reflection and to look at their own traumas and behaviors, then they will not change. And most blame their actions on the victim.
Please Read The Following:
Up to 75% of women entering DV shelters report that their abuser threatened, harmed, or killed their pets in the presence of children (safehouse.org, 2024).
Up to 65% of domestic violence victims and 48% of battered women remain in abusive homes out of fear for their pets.
Only around 5% of U.S. shelters have any kind of housing for pets of domestic violence victims (https://www.drmartybecker.com, 2017).
Why Do Abuser Use Pets To Terrorize Their Human Partners?
· Creating fear: Abusers may torture or kill a pet to demonstrate what they are capable of doing to their human victim or their children.
v There were many times when I saw and heard my ex-husband’s violence against my animals. He would muzzle my outside dogs all night long most of the time. And he would beat my cats with a belt if they meowed at night. He also scared my cats so much with a broom that they began to have a very strong fear reaction for many years following me leaving him.
· Leverage to prevent escape: Many women fear for their pet’s safety is the primary reason they delay leaving an abusive relationship.
v One of his favorite things to say was, “One day you’re going to look up and all of your animals will be gone. You just might come home one day, and they will have vanished.”
· Punishment and retaliation: Abusers may harm a pet as punishment for a perceived transgression or in retaliation for a partner trying to leave.
v After 13 years of being in a domestic violence situation, and over a year of planning my departure, I left him hoping things would cool down enough to go back and get my animals as a way of saying, “I’m done.” Two weeks later, I went back to retrieve my animals, and most had been starved. There was no water. A few of the ones remaining had been eaten by other animals or were mysteriously cut in half. On that day, I was able to get out two cats and my African Grey parrot. Only three of the many that I owned. My cats were starving and had old, moldy food. My bird had moldy food and dirty water. My outside cats were nowhere to be found. And my dogs had been shot which was witnessed by a neighbor. And the sights and smells can never be undone.
· Forcing participation: Some women survivors tell about how they were forced to participate in illegal acts under threat of harm to their pets.
v Luckily, I was never forced to do this. Because they would’ve had to do something for me. Because I don’t have the capability to hurt my pets.
“Seeing her hurt was more than I could bear.
I couldn’t and wouldn’t leave my pets.”
-Sarah, DV Victim
Women have reported:
“He kicked the dog repeatedly until it was howling in pain.”
“He put his hand into the goldfish bowl in front of my five-year-old daughter and squashed the goldfish, for no apparent reason.”
“I can remember an instance when he picked the cat up and with full force drop-kicked it from the back door. He did it because he saw the cat on the workshop. I thought the cat might die.”
Resources for victims who want to leave with their pets:
· National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
· The Purple Leash Project
o Our goal: To see 25% of domestic violence shelters become pet-friendly by 2025.
· Safe Havens for Pets
o For pets are sheltering services that help individuals who are experiencing domestic violence or homelessness with a companion animal (https://www.safehavensforpets.org, 2023).
· RedRover Relief
o Mission is to “bring animals out of crisis and strengthen the bond between people and animals through emergency sheltering, disaster-relief services, financial assistance, and education.
· URINYC PALS (New York City)
· Paws for Safety (Rockland County, New York)
· Praline’s Backyard (Snellville, Georgia)
· Ahimsa House (Georgia)
· Shelter our Pets (New Jersey)
· Network for Pets of Domestic Violence Victims (www.npdvv.org).
· This is a list of pet-friendly domestic violence shelters (https://saftprogram.org, 2025).
I completely and unapologetically understand the fear that abusers instill in victims about their victims and their pets. I encourage you to seek help by way of organizations that are listed here and the many others that I don’t have the space to acknowledge. Animal abuse is a crime in all 50 states. And each state has anti-cruelty statutes that include felony-level provisions for acts of violence against animals.
And they will “love bomb” and abuse you until you concede. That is part of their “reign of terror.” They are master manipulators and will suck the soul from your mind and body. And then tell people that you enjoyed it. It is imperative for you and those you love, including your pets, to find a way out of that situation. I beg you to please continue searching for help in every way possible. Because they will do it again. And candy and flowers won’t make it better.
Thanks for reading even though difficult it may be. Please seek help for those you love even if that is for yourself. You and your pets are worth the love and compassion that is waiting for you all. Keep reading. Keep hope alive.
Affirmation: I forgive myself for believing all relationships are abusive and violent.
“Cat fact: Once you own a cat the probability that you bring up cats in conversation increases by 200%.”
-@mickeyandmort
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Today, I want to share a short story that I wrote a few years ago. It involves my cat Tinkerbell. Sometimes you just have to take time out to thank the universe for giving things a second chance. This was one of those times.
One night I visited my parents who live no more than 60 ft from my house. I stayed over there for maybe an hour and came back home. My cats never miss a chance to greet me at the door like I’ve just returned from a 21-day furlough in Denton, TX. And they meow like they haven’t been fed the entire time. They do this because when I go to the store to pick up my groceries, I always bring back a snack for them. Therefore, every time I leave and come back that means that they have a new treat. (Yes, I have created this situation, and I hate myself for doing it.) but after ignoring their cat woes they will eventually settle down and find a place to sleep or breakout in an all-out sprinting and body slamming each other which is another little love language behavior. Not paying attention to anything but the movie, I look and see Coco beginning to settle down in her rocking chair. Tink was quiet and out of view. This means the same thing as it does for a toddler, trouble.
I get up and start looking for her. Then I heard what can make me sit straight up in the middle of the night, the sound of a cat vomiting. I flip the light on in the kitchen and realize that Tink has her back to me. The closer my hand gets, her growl lets me be aware that she is trying to hide something from me. Again, I can see that she’s chewing on something and gagging even more. I decided to go in even if I need a rabies shot soon after. I go in for the kill and stick my hand into the dark bracing myself for her angry bite. And I feel something that is not her and yank quickly. All I can do is shake my head. She was trying to swallow a rubber band. She darts out quickly. I angrily shout, “Dammit Tink you could’ve died!!!!” She scurries under the bed and out of sight. I take a deep breath knowing how lucky my sweet, crazy girl was in this situation. I clean the mess off the floor. I take another deep breath. And turn the light off. I look for her frantically to find her sound asleep on the bed and I whisper, “Thank you, Universe.”
Thanks for reading! Never forget to thank the universe for the little gifts that it blesses you with. Keep smiling!
Affirmation: I have the power to get in trouble for no good reason.
“When I feel bad, I just look at my cats and my courage returns.“
-Charles Bukowski
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negativity energy, go away. Today, I want to discuss and let you see how the girls’ practice self-care. It’s such an integral part of staying both mentally and physiclally healthy. And I have tried to impress upon the them the importance of this concept. I will take you cat by cat to prove that they have grasped the idea of the importance of self-care.
COCO
Spread out and give yourself roomGet plenty of rest.Feel your feelings and stay safe.Find a safe place
Tinkerbell
Make new friendsDo yoga.Eat a good old fashioned snow cone.Exercise
Make sure you get plenty to eat.
Piper
Find healthy outlet for your anger.Stay nice and warm.Stay hydrated even if it’s your momma’s drink.Ask for what you need.
AND ABOVE ALL….PRAY!
I hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog. Always remember that self-care isn’t a chore. It’s a necessity. Keep smiling!. And keep reading!
Affirmation: I choose to relax and enjoy the moment.
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. I know lately I’ve been storming the door with some hot topics. So, I thought that I would take time out to talk to you about some of my cat parenting woes. Tink and Coco are my girls, and I love them dearly. But one thing I have come to notice is how they suck at playing the game “Hide-and-Seek.” I had finally reached the end of my rope while suffering in silence over this. And I had to just breakdown and get a “Hide-and-Seek” tutor. Do you know how difficult they are to find?!
When I’m finally brave enough to ask a tween to help explain the concept to my children in a way that they can understand, I have to face my fears and tell them that my children that have the issues are not “technically” human children. They are my cats. They begin laughing hysterically. Not the cats. Coco and Tink are horribly embarrassed and are not grateful for my efforts. The child that has empathy for our situation prefers to remain anonymous.
Ok, I’m going out on a limb, while swallowing my pride, to show you the reasons why I had to get a tutor for my cats. Below are a few examples.
Tink: Psst! guess who?
Coco: Tink you have to put your ears down dummy.
Tink: you big idiot! You just gave away my hiding place!!!! Ugh!!! She wouldn’t have noticed!! I hope you get a dingleberry the size of a tennis ball!!!!
I understand that their recovery is “a marathon, not a sprint.” And I ask for your prayers for the three of us as we continue to work as a family, to continually face our fears to help Tink and Coco with their deficits in playing a simple game that is shared and played throughout all cultures and regions of the world. And how one day we can bring awareness to other cat families about how we can learn to live unaggressive and how to enjoy “family time” comfortably again in the near future. Thanks for your support as we struggle!
“One cat might not fix all your problems…but three might.“
-@mangosnickerskiwi
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy, go away. Today, I want to tell you about when Piper met her brothers, Marshall, and Copeland for the first time. Here’s how our conversation went.
Piper: “Momma?”
Me: “Yes, Piper?”
Piper: “Who are those loud boys?”
Me: “Those are your brothers.”
Piper: “Well, I like them.”
Me: “So do I, baby.”
Piper: “They played with me until I couldn’t play anymore. I had to take a few “kitty naps” to keep up with them. And when they went home, I had to take a long “kitty nap.”
Me: “Oh don’t worry. So, do me and your sisters, Coco and Tinkerbell. We always take a nap when they go home.”
Piper: “Did you know that I farted in their faces?”
Me: “I think we all knew when that happened.”
Piper: “Well, Marshall was tickling my belly and then I ended upside down. So, I let it rip to get him back.”
Me: “Yea. Sometimes I do that too. But they love you very much.”
Piper: “And I love them too. You know Willow from 3 Southern Cats?”
Me: “Yes. But she recently died.”
Piper: “I know. I heard you and the boys talking about it and they were sad. Willow used to say that when she farted on something, it was hers. So technically, ya’ll are all mine.”
Me: “Well, you have a point. You have successfully farted on every one of us.”
Piper: “Yep, I’ve been secretly practicing when I go to the litterbox.”
Me: “Trust me. I has been no secret.”
Piper: “Well, I’ll keep practicing.”
Me: “I would prefer that you not practice in our laps. Only in the litterbox.”
Piper: “Well what about my sisters?”
Me: “I would prefer they do the same.”
Piper: “Ok, momma. What if I do it right in front of the fan like Tink does?”
Me: “Please don’t. I can’t take another cat like that.”
Piper: “Ok. I’ll just talk to tha Jesus about it.”
Me: “Well, he’s the only one that can handle those evil smells.”
Piper: “Dear Jesus, this is Piper again. Thank you so much for my big brothers. And you know that I’m sorry for farting on them and momma. They say that it’s evil. Is that right? If so, please remove that evilness from my belly. And please tell them to stop patting my belly. Because that’s what triggers evilness to come forth. Your humble servant, Piper. Amen.”
Me: “Very good, Piper. Now all we must do is try and survive until Jesus works his magic.”
Piper: “I love you, momma.”
Me: “I love you too, baby girl.”
Thanks again for reading. I will continue to update you on our new life with little Piper. I am happy to say that she has been officially accepted into our family begrudgingly by her sisters. And Piper is helping them get more exercise by playing with her. Keep reading. And stay connected by subscribing to our blog.
“I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days.”
-Bill Dana
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy, go away. Today, I want to update you on the speaking of Piper. She might be little. But she is mighty. The following is a conversation that we had recently.
Piper: “Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow.”
Me: “Piper, what are you saying?”
Piper: “Mooooooomma?”
Me: “There you go. I knew you could do it.”
Piper: “Wait! What am I doing?”
Me: “You’re speaking English. What were you doing just now?”
Piper: “Oh, I was talking to tha Jesus.”
Me: “Really? About what?”
Piper: “Well, I was saying a prayer while speaking “Cat.” Do you think he understood me?”
Me: “Well, I would guess so since he created you.”
Piper: “He created me?”
Me: “Why yes. Jesus is behind all things good.”
Piper: “But momma those other people unalived my littermates.”
Me: “Ah yes. Baby, he’ll take care of those people. One day I’ll tell you about the red light in the ground. But he made sure you and your brother made it.
Piper: “Why? The red light in the ground? What is that?””
Me: “Well, I don’t know. Maybe it was because he knew that me and your sisters needed you in our family. And the red light in the ground is where bad people go. They always need water. It’s hot. And they will be sad forever.”
Piper: “Whoa. Do you mean Jesus can do that? Well, I don’t want them to die. I just want them to be covered in fleas without flea medicine.”
Me: “Oh yes. Jesus can do anything.”
Piper: “So, how do I thank the Jesus for doing that?”
Me: ”Well, you just pray and tell Jesus.”
Piper: “Do you mean like I was doing?”
Me: “Of course. Go ahead and speak English. He’ll understand.”
Piper: “So, does Jesus have Google translate or Rosetta Stone?”
Me: “Well, Jesus doesn’t need that. But if he did, he would use it. Go ahead and talk to him.”
Piper: “Dear Jesus, thank you for my momma that took us out of that hot sun and to the vet. Thank you for letting them help me. However, I didn’t like the thermometer. I could really do without that. And thank you for my new mommy. She does say words I don’t understand. But I think it’s because of my needles attached to my baby paws. So, please don’t be mad at her. She loves me so much! And dear Jesus, as your humble servant, I ask that you please take that evil hiss out of my sisters’ throats. Amen.”
Me: “Incredibly good, Piper.
Piper: “How do I know if he heard me?
Me: “When you said, “amen” it was like you put a stamp on the letter. It was delivered straight to heaven. Just give your sisters time. Jesus will work on them.”
Piper: “Thank you, momma. Can I have another cookie?”
Me: “You’re welcome, baby. Ummmm. You’ve already had sixty-two treats.”
Piper: “Then can I have 63?”
Me: “Fine. But only one more.”
Thanks for reading. Make sure and subscribe to this blog. So, that you never miss another post and updates on the lives of me and Coco, Tinkerbell, and Piper. Keep reading. And keep smiling.
Affirmation: The world can be cruel. So, I won’t be.
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy, go away. Today is a special day because I brought this beautiful little girl into our family. She is the epitome of being a survivor.
I had been wanting a new kitten for over a year. And I always thought that the name Onyx would be a great name for a black cat. I looked locally and the black kittens were either feral, no veterinary care or too expensive. But then I saw the story about this litter. And I just could not seem to put it out of my mind.
The story goes like this…Someone left a litter of kittens in a concrete parking lot in a metal cage. And there were two little ones that were hanging on for dear life. I know. I want to find those people and set them on fire too. People are just a special kind of evil for doing things like that. A lady saw them as she pulled up to the store and rescued them. And went to get veterinary care. She and her family also hand fed and spent countless hours and emotions making sure those two babies made it. A month later, I my heart told me, “That little girl is the one.”
Me and the owners talked, and I realized what this special little kitten would be for me. I met up with one of the owners at a neutral place. I got the kitten’s tiny little body out of her crate while she meowed. And I melted and then lost my breath all at once. That little girl melted my heart once I saw her. I lost my breath not from her beauty but from her tiny little “murder mittens” that reached out for safety and grabbed my boob. I felt like I had just been stabbed and was clinging to life. I’m pretty sure I dissociated too. I really hope the fear in my face and the gasp from my throat wasn’t noticed.
To keep from trying to make her a black cat when she is not, I have changed her name to Piper. And from what I can tell, the name suits her simply fine. We need each other. Her sisters Tink and Coco are not grateful for her arrival currently. I am guessing that it is because neither of them wanted to share lap space or cookies. I talked to them like toddlers saying, “We do not hiss and try to bite our friends. She is a kitten. Not a crocodile. And she is your sister.” They did not seem to care about the rationale. And they continue to hiss and sulk.
I am now at my “cat limit.” Me and my girls know how to do two things, “We know how to adapt to change and love.” We do not always do it with a smile on our faces and with love in our hearts. But little Piper is just what the three of us needed to complete our family unit.
Big brothers, Marshall and Copeland, will give her “a run for her money.” But they will no doubt love her too. She already speaks English and is sassy and mouthy just like her sisters. Stay tuned for more interactions with my three amigos. Welcome Home, Piper!
Thanks for reading! And Please Spay and Neuter Your Pets!
“There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: Music and cats.”
-Albert Schweitzer
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. One of my favorite things to do is writing captions and dialogs about my cats Tink and Coco. They both have a very extensive vocabulary. And even more developed is their imagination and view on life. Coco is a very dominant shorthair grey tabby who takes her seniority very seriously. And Tink is a very submissive calico who thinks that the closer she is with her momma, the happier she is. She does, however, have one major problem. She likes to “crop dust” her farts all over my house and on me. She has absolutely no conscience about doing so. Now, sit for a few minutes and enjoy reading, “Tink and the Fart.”
Tink: “Oh that’s a good one!!”
Coco: “Tink did you fart?!”
Tink:”Yes. I was playing with our shiny toy balls and my stomach slammed on breaks and said, “Fart Now! Fart Now!” So I did and I feel better.”
Coco: “Well I’m on the brink of death! Who or what did you eat?!”
Tink: “I don’t have to tell you anything!”
Coco: “I know your butt told me what you did!”
Tink: “Momma!!!!!”
Me: “What is that screaming?! OMG, Tink did you fart?”
Coco: “Yes Ma’am. And I think she summoned a demon when she did it. She did it under the sign you had posted.”
Tink: “Yes sorry. It slipped.”
Me: “Coco, what are you doing?!”
Coco: “I’m looking for good air anywhere I can find it.”
Me: “In the sock drawer, really?”
Coco: “I was desperate. Momma hurry grab the zofran!!”
Me: “Coco y’all are such drama queens.”
Coco: “But I can’t breathe and I see Nannie!”
Tink: “That’s right. You big baby!”
Me: “Hold up. If you farted and are now seeing Nannie that means you are close to death.”
Coco: “You have no idea how close. you’re going to pay big for that one, Tink!”
Coco: “Mama, now I’m seeing Nannie and Jesus! I see the bright light, too!!!!”
Me: “Where, Coco, where?”
Coco: “They’re on the ceiling.”
Me: “Coco stop looking at the ceiling!!!”
Coco: “Where did the bright light, Nannie and Jesus go?”
Me: “Coco, you were not about to die. You were looking at the lights on the ceiling fan.”
Coco: “But what about Nannie and Jesus?”
Me: “Nope. Seeing Jesus after cat fart poisoning is highly unlikely.”
Coco: “But mama? I could’ve died. Tink, you better not ever close your eyes!!!”
Me: “Coco you better not hurt her. Remember SHELTER!! 2 female cats = Drama”
“Love is like a fart, it comes unexpectedly.”
-Unknown
Affirmation: “I embrace my farts and all their glory.”
“They want to make you suffer. And for you to take your own life. They really are very sadistic people.”
-Anna A., Victim Of 764
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Okie dokie! Today, I want to talk about online predator groups. I know that the videos that I’ve chosen have some length to them. However, I strongly encourage you to watch these videos. They are graphic in nature. So, please view them at your own discretion.
Some of these predators use platforms where they begin grooming children in areas that is plentiful with kids, online gaming platforms. One thing to remember is that predatory grooming takes on an infinite number of forms and ideas. And these groups that are preying on our kids are on a continuum. These groups seek to control, hurt, manipulate and kill our children. And the predatory group called 764 is one of the most sinister groups.
764 is an online decentralized and transnational sextortion network that is adjacent to the Order of Nine Angels (O9A), a right-wing Satanist terror network. And after gathering information on this group, they are definitely doing the devil’s work. 764’s online networks coerce children into recording themselves engaging in self-harm, sexually explicit acts and violence. This group consists of violent extremists who seek to normalize the production, sharing and possession of child pornography and gore material to desensitize and corrupt youth toward future acts of violence. The group members gain notoriety by systematically targeting, grooming, and extorting victims. They demand that victims engage in and share media of self-mutilation, sexual acts, harm to animals, acts of random violence, suicide and murder. It’s a way of causing chaos by disrupting society.
764 began with Bradley Cadenhead, a teenager from Stephenville, TX. His behavior began at age 8 while watching online porn. His fascination progressed to a fascination with violent torture pictures, videos and gore. He posted a lot on social media about violence. At age 13, he was put on juvenile probation for discussing shooting up a middle school. He briefly returned to a juvenile facility for violating his probation and he continued routinely watching ultra-violent gore content online. Court records have shown that he refused to participate in counseling sessions, repeatedly left home without permission, assaulted his mother, and ingested dangerous amounts of Tylenol and cough syrup which required hospitalization.
His online activities were also unrestricted. While playing Minecraft online he also met another user who deepened his interest in gore. And this is where he learned to groom children on a sextortion server called “CLT.” He then started a Discord server called 764 after the first three digits of his zip code. He along with dozens of others used the 764 Discord server and Telegram to seek out vulnerable children to victimize. Cadenhead moderated the server, which received countless videos and photographs of extreme violence, animal torture. He also posted “How-to” guides on sexually exploiting and extorting minors online to circulate in their channels. Discord reports that when they first identified hundreds of users, they reported it to law enforcement that year. And in 2021, Discord flagged Cadenhead’s online conduct fifty-eight times for sharing “images of prepubescent females and males engaging in sexual act, or in various nude poses.”
Captain Jeremy Lanier, of the Stephenville Police Department, helped to conduct the forensic analysis on Cadenhead’s devices. He is quoted saying, “This wasn’t run-of-the-mill child porn, this was darker. There was one video of a woman being held down and stabbed. This case was awful. It was the worst stuff I’ve ever looked at in six years of working CSAM.” Once a degree of trust was developed Cadenhead and other extorters threatened to harm families and to release the explicit photographs that had been exchanged. They have also convinced children to strangle their pets and bite the heads off pet hamsters on camera. This particular child was found in a bath one night saying that she was to “turn the water red” as requested. The group members also called her school principal and reported that she tried to murder animals which led to a police investigation by local police.
Richard Densmore also known as “Rabid” became popular in 764 by creating “Sewer” communities on Discord where children were recruited by infiltrating online gaming sites. A quote from Densmore would tell victims to cut themselves by saying, “I have all your information. I own you…You do what I say now kitten.” And he would even convince victims to carve “Rabid,” Sewer,“ and “764” onto their bodies with razors and box cutters. He also would sexually exploit the children (justice.gov, 2025).
“These online groups are some of the most egregious online enticement reports that we’re seeing in terms of what they’re seeing that children are being coerced to do.”
-Fallon McNulty, CyberTipline Director
Since 2021 criminal cases were brought again more than a dozen people linked to these types of groups in the United States, Great Britian, Germany, Romania and Brazil. And the US Department of Justice is pursuing federal grand jury proceedings. The group is connected to Eastern European skinhead group who members were also accused of random acts and killings in Ukraine and Russia. Prosecutors have cited Telegram and Discord as the primary means where 764 members operate. They use the platforms “to desensitize vulnerable populations through sharing extreme gore and child sexual abuse material.” However, dozens of Telegram channels remained active. Discord says that they have been shutting down these types of activities on their platform. Discord also said that they now work closely with the FBI and law enforcement agencies. In 2023 Discord blocked 130 groups and 34, 000 accounts linked to 764.
Instagram accounts linked to the extortion networks were still active at the time of this particular article. Despite the parent group Meta implementing bans on 764 related accounts. SoundCloud hosted self-harm and Satanism related playlists which were also allowed to remain online at the time of this information. Even though they release a statement saying, “We strictly prohibit any content that includes or suggests child sexual abuse or grooming on our platform and uses a combination of human moderation and technological tools to identify and remove infringing content.” Roblox, user-created skins for 764 themed characters with the groups sign with open references were also still available. Minecraft, where 764 members are known to be active, reports that there are several systems for removing harmful content including chat filtering, in-game reporting and parental controls. And has teams that participate in review and moderation. A spokesperson for Microsoft, which owns Minecraft’s development studio, states, “Pon private servers that are unmanaged by Minecraft, we will take action to investigate reported violations. However, 764 members have also managed to evade measures the platforms use to try and ban them.
“There’s a far larger pool of recruits and people interested in child abuse and pedophilia that an obscure Satanist sect,”
-Unknown law enforcement official
The FBI and other agencies are investigating 764 and terrorism because of their close ties with Order of Nine Angles, who long with their Satanist rhetoric are also aligned within militant neo-Nazi circles. They use Swastikas, Nazi memes and other propaganda glorifying homicidal members of white supremacist groups like the Atomwaffen Division which frequently appear in Telegram channels. And the urging of children to cut things into their bodies also resemble O9A rituals.
Bradly Cadenhead did admit to the group’s use of the server to do sextortion of individuals. They reported that sometimes they would do it for money. And sometimes they would do it just to have power over another person. And he also admitted that he had urged users in the server to carve his initial on their bodies as a form of homage. Therefore, many of the participants see him as a type of cult leader. Cadenhead pleaded guilty to all he was charged with and was sentenced to 80 years in prison. He is now 18 years old and currently incarcerated at Estelle State Prison in Huntsville, TX (wired.com, 2024).
I know you might be asking why I sometimes share horribly graphic information? And what I can tell you is this, “If you are grossed out and offended by this topic, good. You need to be. My life has been severely impacted by child predators on more than one occasion. And something that started out innocent progressed into a world full of horrors. We as parents seem to think that predatory people are easy to spot. They are the ones who act, dress and speak in a way that deviates from the societal norms. What I experienced was from people who I had already met. Some baby sat me as a child and were very seemingly genuine people. They were nice and built me up. They told me all the things I wanted to hear. And they gave me gifts so they could get close enough as a “friend” setting me up for their next moves. And then in a very carefully planned fashion, they got me to take the first step towards them and set their predatory trap. Then they very gently reeled me in hook, line and sinker. They were not strangers. They were in my church, schools, sports and anywhere else they can find their prey. Your kids might’ve found a new online friend who seems to be a very genuine person. They might pretend to have benign interests and just want to have a new online gaming friend. Remember that predators blend in not stand out. Standing out brings them unwanted attention and threaten to expose their evils. People, please understand that perpetrators operate in the shadows not the light. The light outshines darkness which makes it very uncomfortable for them to be unnoticed. So, they get their satisfaction from the thrill of the manipulative hunt seeking to kill and destroy your loved one.” And when one goes to prison, there are hundreds upon thousands of perpetrators looking to fill that spot.
I love my children and want them to enjoy their childhoods. However, I’m not ok with sacrificing their safety in order to appease someone’s sick curiosity. I’m not saying to not let your children play games online. What I am telling you is to form an even closer bond by challenging something in their behavior that is burning in your gut. And even if you don’t feel that, talk with them regularly about groups like this. Ask them if any of their “online” friends have reported such people. But above all, if something doesn’t seem right, check it out. Our children don’t even gasp the concept of evil predators like this. And I can tell you, that had this been an avenue that I could’ve gone down as a teen, I would’ve walked right into the woods with a clown for a handful of candy. My parents tried to shield us from most harmful things. But I still wasn’t safe from predators. I was taught to trust people until I couldn’t. And, unfortunately, when I understood that point it was too late. I was already in the grasp of a perpetrator. Thanks for reading!
“I’ve been praying for someone to get me out of there since day one. Where were you all this time? Where were you four months ago?!”
“Nothing is more creative…nor destructive…than a brilliant mind with a purpose.”
-Dan Brown
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Okie dokie! Wow. I had no idea that I would write about this topic today. And it’s a concept that has haunted me for many years. What is my purpose in life?
Is my purpose to see how many punches I can take and still walk out of the fire alive? Ok. I’ve done that and continued to do that on a daily basis. Is it to conform to societal standards of what “normal” is? That will never be me. Is it to tackle difficult subjects that make people cringe? You’re getting warmer. Well, let me see if I can discern the information that I know without a doubt.
1. I love helping people. Helping people is a burden on your soul. You don’t decide to help people because of a dollar sign. Helping people whether on an ambulance or in an addiction facility has always been my niche. My actions are done because of a calling that I was born to do. If anyone needs help and I can provide it, I will. That is one of the things that my family dynamics impressed upon me.
2. Helping and caring for animals. You also don’t just decide to have compassion for animals. Some people say these things and yet I watch them beat their animals without constraint. My ex-husband has always said that he was an animal lover. That is the farthest thing from the truth. I’ll never forget the screams of my animals when he would take a belt, in the middle of the night, and go beat them. And I was completely powerless to defend them. When I left that horribly abusive situation, my animals were killed. My animals and the other animals that I interact with are my kids. I learned a long time ago, that I could trust animals when I couldn’t humans.
3. Speaking up about difficult topics. I have no problem talking about really difficult topics in society. Sometimes it doesn’t make me the most popular person. And I don’t care. The topics of racism, mental illness, addiction, abuse, medical cannabis, suicide, self-harm, sexual abuse, puberty, predators, LGBTQ+ equality, rape, parenting or any other topic that makes us cringe. What you don’t see is how sometimes I struggle discussing them. Part of that is because of how I was raised. In the deep south, we are taught to not create any waves as it might reflect poorly on the family. And to know our places as children which was to always respect your elders without question. But what if you are a bystander to something that is abusive, and you don’t speak up? That’s what keeps me up at night. The personal information that I blog about that has happened or is currently happening in my life isn’t always pretty. And I realize that I’m not the savior who can swoop in and rescue people. I can, however, do my part as a human being. And, yes, I still worry about things that I cannot control and still become obsessions.
4. Writing is a passion. I began writing out of necessity. When I left my abusive therapist, I felt completely broken. The person I went to for help betrayed me in a way that continues to affect me. And unless you have been abused, you have no idea the hurdles that would have to be overcome to continue moving forward. And the complete disconnect between your emotions and your brain So, I began writing about topics that were affecting me in that moment. And suddenly, I began to get relief even if I hadn’t found the answers that I needed. I finally felt like I had a voice that deserved to be heard. I was tired of remaining quite as I had been expected to do my whole life. That’s when I realized that I wasn’t all those names that I had been called. I was someone who had information and experiences to share in order to help others. I have always felt alone no matter how many people I was around or despite the number of smiles that I put on my face. Blogging itself is a platform to help others in similar situations understand that they are not alone. Had someone just explained to me that my situations were not ok and that millions of people, worldwide, suffer in silence as I have, maybe that sense of loneliness would’ve diminished. However, when it’s happening to you especially all of the manipulation and brainwashing that occurs, you cannot see past the moment. Abuse leaves you questioning everything about the next person and even those in my family. I knew one thing for sure, I could not remain quiet.
5. Humor brings me enjoyment. Humor has always been one of my greatest coping skills. I go through life as a literal thinker. So, if someone has a “Freudian slip” I will laugh myself silly even if that slip up was from myself. Humor a lot of times was used against me to make me a public spectacle. And it was done in a very demeaning way. As a way of life, I learned how to beat someone to the punch on a smartass comment. I always try to see the humor in most situations. And when there is no humor, I will find a way to interject some of my own. This gets me in trouble sometimes because that’s not conforming to those around me. And I’m expected to just let crazy happenings go without acknowledgment. That’s like putting a plastic bag over my head and being expected to breathe when the air is gone. I will always point out the sometimes-ridiculous way a situation looks. And I’ll probably write a note about it in my phone to use at a later date. I’m not right or wrong. It’s just how I operate.
My passion and purpose is to help others understand that just because you have taken the broken road in life doesn’t mean that you still can’t achieve happiness and also help others. I write about a lot of maladaptive behaviors that I continue to struggle with. But I also share my experience, strength and hope with those need that need the validation that they are not inherently bad or unworthy of happiness, love and inclusion. I still struggle with that concept. If you are a human being, you will fail. You will fall. You will be forced to confront your demons head-on. And it will scare the literal shit out of you. You will be forced to look at your part in situations. If you do not, you will remain stuck. You except your responsibility and move on whether or not the others do the same. You are responsible for only your feelings and emotions that are constantly changing. If they don’t except their responsibility, then they will shift the blame back to you. Push that shit out of the way. Hold your head high. And leave those people like a boss. You are worthy. You are loved. And you are enough!
“Be a lamp, or a lifeboat, or a ladder. Help someone’s soul heal. Walk out of your house like a shepherd.”
“To make mistakes is human; to stumble is commonplace. To be able to laugh at yourself is maturity.”
-William Arthur Ward
Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy goes away. Okie dokie! Today I want to tell you about one of my follies. I began many years ago working for a local veterinarian. Ok, it was a long time ago. I wasn’t surprised because my love and very strong connection with animals just led me in that direction. Then the opportunity presented itself so that I could house sit people’s pets while they were away. I have taken care of dogs, cats, frogs, pigs and others that at one time or another had their own follies. This was one of those times.
I was housesitting a little, old poodle named Abby. This old girl is spicy in her own way. She is so sassy, in fact, that when her owners are gone she DEMANDS that I give her multiple treats every time I go see her. While I enjoy spending time with her, we have our own schedule for how we do things. I go to her house and open the door and start looking for her. Being an aged girl, sometimes she doesn’t hear me walk in. I frantically begin looking for her when I don’t see her because in my mind I’m looking for a body. She is in great health to be so old. But the thought that nature will act when I least expect it is one of my greatest fears. I couldn’t find her initially. But I soon find her lying in her cozy bed sound asleep. So, I gently start petting her and startled when she awakens with the look of, “How did you get in here without me knowing?” I always act excited to see her so that she knows that everything is ok on my end of the relationship. However, this particular night had much more in store for me than I bargained for.
I take her outside as usual for her night time potty session. Before I lock up for the night I always make sure that she has food and water available in both areas of the house that have been designated in advance. I walk to the back of the house and enter a back bedroom. What I saw horrified me. There is a purse that has been knocked to the ground and everything strewn from within including lipstick. Naturally, I think, “Oh no! Someone has gotten into the house and robbed Jojo and Poppy!” I look around the room and notice that a family picture has been knocked off the wall and I think, “I have watched many hours of true crime shows and know that these signs are because of something personal.” Then I get really scared. I make a mental note and then begin constructing a plan for how I would reach safety. I can’t scream or make any loud noises because if the criminal was still in the house I could get murdered. I know. My past trauma has led to this moment.
I quickly walk back through the house with my eye on the front door. I also pay very close attention when moving past other doorways while keeping an eye out for intruders. I have a feeling that this night could be my last. I finally make it to the front door and out I go. I don’t know why I didn’t think of Abby at this moment. Apparently, though, I must’ve thought everyone for himself. I make it to the middle of the driveway and call my daddy who lives directly across the street. With a shaking voice and body I tell him, “Jojo and Poppy’s house has been robbed.” I explained what I had seen and he said he would come over and check things himself. When he makes it to where I’m standing I begin telling the story all over again. As you can imagine, I was very animated.
We walked back into the house together. I am thinking, “Now both me and my daddy are going to die!” I followed him while telling him, “Daddy be careful they could still be in here.” We finally made it to the back bedroom and I showed him exactly what I had seen. He began to look things over and we saw a pack of saltine crackers in one of the recliners that had been absolutely demolished. I said, “Crap! The intruder needed a snack!” So, now I’m positive that the criminal is well nourished and ready to kill. He walks over to where a picture in a frame laid face down on the floor. I said to him, “See that’s what I was telling you.” He bent down to pick it up and he said, “Dana, this is a scale for someone to weigh on.” My eyesight has failed me on numerous occasions. And apparently this was another time. He looked through Jojo’s purse and the scene before us and said, “I bet that dog got those crackers out of her purse and then dragged them over to the recliner where she had her little snack.” I called Jojo reluctantly and explained the situation to which she had a good laugh. She said, “Yea, Abby is probably mad that we’ve been gone too long.” It turns out that that was, in fact, what had happened. There was no boogerman that needed a snack that night. Only a sassy little poodle who thought, “My momma and daddy have been gone too long so, I will eat her leftover crackers in her purse while I drag everything else out. And I’ll set up the whole situation so that Dana will think that she is about to get murdered.”
I tell you this comical story to let you know that it’s ok to laugh at yourself. Life happens sometimes in the most comical of ways. Abby is doing fine and is still demanding multiple treats each time I go to check on her. And that little spicy old lady continues to bless my life each and every time our eyes meet.
“If you can laugh at yourself, you are going to be fine. If you allow others to laugh with you, you will be great.”
This Puzzled Life 