respect

darnold1975

Cannabis Smoking Etiquette

“A friend with weed is a friend indeed. A friend who shares is a friend who cares.”

-Unknown

Light the charcoal. Sprinkle the sage. Negative energy go away. Okie dokie! I’ve provided some information on basic things that need to be considered before using cannabis products. As time keeps creeping closer to 420, I thought that I would explain one more thing, smoking etiquette.

Some people have no idea that there is a certain way to conduct your smoking sesh with friends. If you are by yourself, then do what you want. The last thing you want, though, is to be smoking at someone else’s house because of an invite and be the only one in the sesh who doesn’t know what they’re doing. The invite is ruined and you probably won’t get another one. You don’t have to be perfect. Just know the basics and you’ll pick up on the rest.

The main thing to remember is that the sesh is about respect, consideration, and ensuring that everyone has a good time. 

  1. Be warm and welcoming. Respect people’s boundaries. Do NOT pressure anyone who does not want to participate. Do NOT blow smoke in someone’s face or on pets. That is being an asshole. And I would kick you out of my circle.
  2. Make sure your equipment is clean and so are your surroundings. No one wants to smoke out of a crusty bong with stale water. If using glass mix some 90% alcohol with salt. The salt will act as a scrubber to get the crusties and resin off. If you are using a pipe or silicone, leave it in the alcohol for about 10 minutes. Then use a toothbrush to get off the remaining residue. You might have to do this again during the sesh depending on how thick the resin gets while smoking.
  3. Always contribute to the mix. Take cannabis with you and give it to the person who’s running the circle. You don’t have to bring a bunch. Just bring something. Or ask to help provide drinks and snacks. Those munchies are angry little beasts that demand to be fed.
  4. Inform other participants the name of the strain you brought. It’s just a common courtesy to let someone know what they’re consuming.
  5. Respect the roller or packer. Do NOT criticize what the results of their rolling looks like. You were invited and can be uninvited really quickly.
  6. Do Not smoke or allow someone to smoke when they are sick. No one wants germs.
  7. Do Not stick the joint or blunt far in your mouth. You are there to smoke it, not make out with it.
  8. The term “Puff, Puff, Pass” actually has meaning. Take two puffs and pass in the direction of the circle. No one in the circle likes a smoker who bogarts. Plus, the circle moves harmoniously.

“Being misunderstood doesn’t mean you’re the issue…sometimes it’s the societal lens that needs cleaning.”

-Bob Marley

  1. If you are passing a bowl, DO NOT light the entire bowl like when you are at home. Everyone enjoys tasting the fresh green. Light only small corners or areas.
  2. Regardless of what friend’s house you might go to, respect their property and other family members. You are the guest, not the warden or at a frat party. If they ask you not to smoke in certain areas, respect their wishes. If they have small children or a spouse that is sleeping, be mindful of noise levels.
  3. If you are a new smoker, know your limit. If you tell them that you want to take a break. Anyone who knows etiquette, will respect your decisions without badgering you. Plus, no one wants a slobbering idiot who overindulges.
  4. And last but not least, always pass to the left. It’s just a stoner’s tradition.

I hope that you now feel a little more prepared for the glorious day of 4/20. Cannabis is about being chill. It’s not about creating unnecessary, alcohol induced “redneck drama”. Laugh and have fun. But don’t get ridiculous. Some of these very simple reminders can make the smoke sesh so much more enjoyable. And they’ll want to invite you back. The countdown to 4/20 is on! Thanks for reading! 

“Society has unfairly labeled stoners without understanding the depth behind the smoke.”

-Carl Sagan

#Thispuzzledlife

darnold1975

The Angry Addict

The Angry Addict

Sometimes I find things that I’ve written but haven’t published on my blog. This is one of those writings….
There was a day when an angry addict walked through a treatment center door. A break from a harsh life and there would be many more. The addict was still a person, but we would prove to be one heck of a chore. Compassion was what she was craving, and her heart screamed, “More, more, more!”
This professional she was different and left judgement at the door. The patient she was also different, but she was never a bore. The pain was written all over that addict’s face. Turn her inside out and trapped inside was a very hurt child that simply needed some grace.
The addict asked, “What do you want? And why do you care?” With confidence, dark eyes and long black hair she answered, “Because you’re talking to someone who has already been there. I can tell someone has hurt you and I want you to tell me about it.” Like a puppy this grown child followed behind that confident swagger.
This one she was different, and the addict could tell. Talk about mean people from her past and present? Why did it even matter? Because when you walked in, I could recognize that war fought tattered look. He made off with your sanity like a cold and heartless crook. Wheat he showed was not love and I’m telling you the truth. You were at the mercy of a dark man and when he’s done is called abuse. I want to know the things they all did to you. Look into my eyes and know that love lives here not abuse.
We’re going to be serious for a moment so put the jokes, smiles and laughter away. My heart and stomach seemed to find that familiar sting that no one could make go away. I can see in your eyes that you’ve be battling for years. Drip, drip, drip and the grief poured out in a flood of uncontrollable tears. Gently she said, “Let me and others love you until you can love yourself.” Know that not all people hurt you like you’ve done to yourself. She saw the addict’s heart was as raw as her arms. And told her, “You can trust me because I love, and I will not hurt you.”
The 90 days in treatment had come and gone. And now she would return to her abusive home. But someone cared about what she had been through. As she made her way to the exit she heard, “Take care of yourself. You know I think you’re different.” And then the quick reply, “And so are you.”
Five years later the addict was a student and doing exactly what she said she would do. And one day she called that professional out of the blue. Months went by and their relationship grew from a “random connection” that was true. She finally got the courage to tell that husband, “We’re through.”
Days and nights where she would learn from her compassionate teacher. Yoda was teaching her now “open-hearted” adult kid because she knew how to reach her. A visitor to their house was confused about who I was, and I said, “I’m just a close friend.” The professional known as Sarah being as serious as she could be. She looked at the visitor and said, “No she’s our daughter.” I thought wait that’s me.
She told me one day, “Dana, remember this about how he treated you……
“Not everyone can see the good in a person because they’re always looking for their faults. He missed seeing the reasons we love you and that was his fault. If you see past cuts and scrapes on your skin and can look through all the bones and into your chest and hurting heart and under the thick layers of material that help to encapsulate your that fragile heart is a secret space and in that space is some material that’s growing and bubbling over and saturating your chest cavity with something called personal beauty. And that’s what we see and love you for every day.”
Our mother/daughter relationship grew into one that survived off promises, goals, loyalty, love and mutual respect. She was my personal definition of safety. But the day would come when she would be ripped from my protective grip. By an unforgiving disease that could careless who’s heart it would strip. My heart that was wide open began sounding the retreat back behind those protective walls never again to repeat.
But my heart never lets me forget that horrible day. I went when I was called home to the hospital because of promises we both made. And when it was time, I sat at her feet knowing that soon her maker she would meet. With my heart breaking and tears rolling down my cheeks. I took one big final gasp of air with her not knowing how I could just be.
She was my everything and I was her adult kid. How lucky I was to be with her when I felt her leave. “Dana if you ever get stuck not knowing what to do. Do the next right thing and hit your knees if you choose.” Her words still guide me with her presence gone. And I would give anything for her to pick up that phone. I want her approval either right or wrong.
A year and a half later when more bad things happened and the continual hemorrhaging of a once loveable heart. And a mind and body that had continued in a war. We entered the doors of another treatment center and dragging the leftovers of what used to be a human behind me. And a day later we would meet our new professional and something internally would change.
Angry at people for being hurtful and hating this lonely life without Sarah, I began striking out at everyone and everything even those that loved me. I wanted someone or something to pay for taking her away. Relationships began falling like the twin towers. I swore that no on would get close to me for very long without me destroying the relationship just so I wouldn’t have to feel that bad and scared ever again. Sarah was still somewhere close, but I was fighting mad. But this new professional we met with fire and venom never flinched. I tried everything I could to push her away. But the next time I felt Sarah this is what she would say, “Dana leave her alone because she is one that will stay. I picked her out for you and she’s who you need starting today. She’s the one you need. So, make it happen and move there.” That wasn’t what I wanted to hear because I wanted to prove my point that she would leave like everyone else. Mad I was and madder I got because I didn’t want anyone else to love me and leave.
So, I called up Texas and again found the one that would stay. Whatever I do I just can’t let her get away. She is the last gift I felt my Sarah give. And now she’s working with this angry and very hurt adult kid. The kid screams and silently cries about what others did. For she isn’t bad she’s lost and confused. And wanting her Sarah to hold her while she’s lost and confused. That angry teenage heart that still cries tears of blood. But again, she ran into a wall of pure love.
The pain of losing Sarah has been more than I could bare. But move to Texas I did because she’s never led me astray. I don’t want people to love me so why did I move here? Because I’m that same kid that despite knowing the harsh reality of life that has hurt me so bad. Texas is still better than the desert no matter what “things” I don’t have.
Texas hasn’t been easy, and no one said it would. But we’ve been pulled along by the little engine that could. No one knew what compassion and love can do. But to heal you must expose the bad and the good stuff too. And just for taking time to listen as you always do. Coach this angry kid wants to personally thank you.
#thispuzzledlife